Are You Constantly Feeling Insecure in Your Relationship?

Are You Constantly Feeling Insecure in Your Relationship?

In this video upload I discuss: Are You Constantly Feeling Insecure in Your Relationship?

This is a common problem with many couples in their partnerships but shouldn’t be a problem long term! We all go through stuff in our lives that can leave us feeling less than adequate about who we are.

This affects both men and women because self-esteem issues play havoc with all of us during certain stages of our lives. Working on ourselves is an ongoing process because we don’t stop evolving.

This is a good thing!

This is something we need to share with our partner so we can help each other through those tough times and not let them fester so that it becomes an ongoing insecurity.

pexels-photo-48566

On the other side of the coin, if your partner is trying to make you jealous, talking down to you or squashing your accomplishments you will need to re-think your relationship with them.

Why are you with them and what is keeping you there?

A partnership is supposed to be a reciprocated loving and safe place, not somewhere that constantly makes you question yourself.

What do you think, have you dealt with this scenario in your past? Please leave your comments below this post. 🙂 

Susan McCord  @ The Dear Sybersue Talk Show

Advice Column & Blogs

Anon amous

dear_sybersue__caricature01-2

 

Hi There,

Yes, it is true that it is totally up to us who we allow in our lives and our feelings are our own responsibility. This is why I said you should never feel uncomfortable with your partner.

Some people can be manipulative or verbally abusive which can creep up slowly in a relationship but if you pay close attention in the early stages of a new romance there are usually signs showing who they really are.

Having a reciprocated respect for each other is so important to keep a partnership healthy. I like the fact that you and your wife understand the work involved in maintaining a strong relationship.

Thanks for writing and adding your input. ❤ Dear Sybersue

Are You Way Too Judgmental about People When Out Dating?

Are You Way Too Judgmental about People When Out Dating?

Dear Sybersue’s weekly video upload is a discussion on people who are being too judgmental, especially when out on a date!

Both men and women are quick to complain about how hard it is to date in the millennium but continue to make harsh judgment calls very early on when meeting someone new.

We all have special traits, every last one of us!

Are we trying to sabotage our own happiness because we don’t actually believe that we are worthy of having a great partnership? Is this where our high maintenance judgment comes from; out of fear?

If I blow them off first, they won’t have a chance to reject me?”

As Doctor Phil says: How is that working for you????

Or…

Is is because we are fed up with what’s not working for us right away and that we have become jaded and lazy? Are our expectations out of control?

Why don’t we put the same respect and energy into our relationships that we do for our careers?  As I have said many in many past articles; meeting a life partner is like a full time job!  It takes work and perseverance.

But isn’t it worth it?

I talked to so many men and women on my advice column this past year that just don’t have the patience to date. They give themselves a 2 month window when they go online (or use dating apps) and then when they don’t meet someone right away, they give up!

There’s no one out there, I can’t be bothered wasting my time on this.”

If it’s too easy, too quickly, it usually fizzles just as fast anyway! How long does it take to go to University and get a degree? Many of us seem to have the patience for that! Love and careers are both important in everyone’s life but we often tend to forget that, which makes our priorities out of wack!

They both need your attention!

Who are we becoming and where do we get off looking at someone on Tinder for 20 secs and swipe left because “yech they are sooooooo not our type!” When did we get so shallow?

pexels-photo-276865

If something isn’t working for you it is time to really look at why it isn’t. You are the one in charge of your life decisions so it is YOU that has the authority to make changes that will enhance your love-life.

How Do I Do That?

  1. Start saying positive things about people every day.
  2. The minute you hear pessimism in your voice; stop and alter the direction of your thinking. It won’t be easy at first because you will have to deprogram your mindset to a different frequency.
  3. You want people to give you a chance and you don’t want them to judge you harshly when they first meet you right? Remember this, the next time you engage in a conversation with someone and see how quickly things become optimistic in your life.
  4. Good energy attracts like minded energy! It is so much better being around happy people which is contagious. It can only get better from there.
  5. Remove yourself from judgmental people. “Misery loves company!” The more you put yourself into negative situations the more you will keep attracting them into your life.
  6. Take time out every day to be grateful for something in your world. Say it out loud as you are getting ready for work or going out for the evening. The more gracious you are about your life, the less time you will have to dwell on what doesn’t make you happy.
  7. Hire a Dating/Relationship Coach for a few sessions. They can help you with your self-esteem and what you may not be seeing within yourself. Usually when we are too critical about others it is really because we are also critical of ourselves.

What do you think? Have you been in this judgmental place and how did you handle it?  Please leave your comments below this post, I would love to hear what you have to say! ❤

Questions for Sybersue? Download the free app and text her 24/7 at http://www.instantgo.com/dearsybersue

Susan McCord aka Dear Sybersue

Dear Sybersue YouTube        Dear Sybersue Facebook  

How Do I Change up My Relationship Drama Patterns?

How Do I Change up My Relationship Drama Patterns?

In today’s video Dear Sybersue discusses relationship patterns that aren’t working for many people.

  • Is there too much drama in all of your partnerships?
  • Are you attracting the same types over and over again and not understanding that there is a problem and that you just go onto the next person without too much thought?
  • Are you continually wondering why you are single once again?
  • Have your past relationships been one sided in many aspects of the partnership?
  • Is it a constant struggle to communicate or to be understood in most of your relationships?

If your partnerships are always ending in the same manner, you have a repetitive problem that isn’t being addressed.  Could it be that maybe you are a little stubborn and in denial about the part you play in your relationships?

The old cliche that it takes two people to be in a great relationship still holds true today, so once you take a good hard look at yourself and analyse your actions, you will start to see a destructive pattern.

We spend so much time going after what is on the “top” of our high maintenance checklist that we overlook the fundamentals of what makes the foundation of a strong and loving relationship! We get lost in the trivial and superficial traits that we think are important!

The good news is; it can be fixed! 

It’s time to investigate why you are choosing the wrong people. You need to revise your priorities and step away from that quick sand that you keep having to dig yourself out of.  Relationships shouldn’t have to be a constant struggle, nor should you have to give up “who you are” to be in one.

When a relationship is right, it flows and you work side by side to keep the communication lines open. It is not a drama filled scenario, it is a loving and safe place to be. ❤

Susan McCord ❤

The Dear Sybersue Talk Show YouTube

Dear Sybersue Facebook

Dear Sybersue Instagram

My Boyfriend is Acting Different – Does He Still Love ♥ Me?

My Boyfriend is Acting Different – Does He Still Love ♥ Me?

In the video above Dear Sybersue discusses one of the popular questions she gets on her advice column from women.

“Things have changed within my relationship, how do I know if  my boyfriend is really in love with me?”

If you are asking this question you have probably not been paying attention to what is really going on in your partnership. When it gets to this stage it can often be the “beginning of the end” of your relationship. I am not trying to scare you but it is important for me to point this out and it may not be too late to salvage your love. ❤

Nurturing any relationship in your life is an ongoing necessary practice.

Continue reading

Does Your Partner Keep Threatening to Leave Your Relationship?

Does Your Partner Keep Threatening to Leave Your Relationship?

Dear Sybersue is an Informative and very REAL Dating and Relationship Advice Talk Show for Men & Women of all Ages!

Today Sybersue discusses a relationship problem that affects more couples than you may think! If you end up with a partner who is confrontational and threatens to leave you on a consistent basis, it is time to take action on your end!

You don’t have to live with someone who uses intimidation tactics to get what they want or because they aren’t happy with who they are! You deserve someone who respects you. If you have to walk on eggshells to appease them all the time, how is that a relationship?

A partnership should consist of a reciprocated love and wanting the best for each other. If your partner is constantly throwing out ultimatum threats towards you, then it time to stand up for yourself or get some outside counselling that can help you deal with why you are allowing it.

If they really aren’t happy, let them go. Why should you be their dumping ground for whatever they are not dealing with in their own head?

People who truly love each other do not treat each other this way. You deserve to be in a healthy relationship; do not settle for this type of scenario.

Susan McCord @ http:/www.youtube.com/dearsybersue
http://www.facebook.com/dearsybersue
http://www.instagram.com/dearsybersue
Blogs & Advice Column @ http://www.sybersue.com

 

 

 

 

I am Single but all my Friends are in Relationships! (I have no one to go out with.)

I am Single but all my Friends are in Relationships! (I have no one to go out with.)

Dear Sybersue,

I am so happy to have found you on YouTube and your videos answer many of my questions about dating & relationships! Although, I haven’t seen one that can help me with my question.  That is the reason I am here on your advice column/blog asking for advice. (I hope you will film one regarding this issue for other people as well.)

Here is my question:

I am a 38 year old woman who wants to meet someone special to have a committed partnership with but I have no single friends to go out with.

All of my friends are in relationships and I am tired of being the 3rd wheel! It makes me feel like I am a burden to them and that they feel obligated to let me tag along. (Or they feel sorry for me which is even worse!) I appreciate their support but I think it is wearing thin on them. I try not to complain but sometimes I just can’t help it.

How do I get up the courage to go out alone? How can I meet new people?

Continue reading

Relationship: My Buddy Saw My Girlfriend on a Dating Site!

Relationship: My Buddy Saw My Girlfriend on a Dating Site!

Dear Sybersue answers Scott’s question about his girlfriend Sandra being seen on a dating site by one of his best friends! They have been living together for 2 years! He is in love with her and is very hurt about hearing this upsetting news today.

Scott thought everything was going great! WTF?

They do not have an open relationship and he is exclusively committed to Sandra. He hasn’t confronted her yet because he is trying to make sense of how this could happen.

Did he do something wrong? Is their sex life an issue? Were there some red flags that he ignored? She has shown no indication of being unhappy or discussed any problems with Scott.

Could the information be wrong?

What are your thoughts? How should he confront her? I think most of us would say he should he dump her sorry ass, but he at least needs to hear her side of the story beforehand.

Please leave your comments below & if this has happened to you or know someone this has happened to how did they handle the situation?

Susan McCord @ The Dearsybersue Talk Show
Dear Sybersue Facebook page
Blogs & Advice Column