Setting Boundaries in Your Relationships. Today at Sybersue I discuss the importance of having boundaries in all of your relationships including family and friendships.
If your past relationships have become a repetitive pattern that isn’t working out for you, then it is time to put some boundaries into place. You don’t want to stay stuck in these unhealthy partnerships! If you don’t have some respectful rules about what you will allow or disallow in your life, then you will continue to meet people who try to control you or take advantage of you.
It is important to honor yourself by standing up to people who treat you badly or who try to dominate you. A great relationship consists of two people who not only have their “personal life” together but also have room to prioritize their love for each other as well.
There is no place for power, control, drama, and any type of abuse in a strong and healthy relationship
Self-esteem is a big player in some of the decisions we make in our life. If you look back to some of the bigger relationship issues you have had to deal with over the years, can you now see how or why they may have happened? Or are these issues continuing to replay over and over again which is making you even more emotionally exhausted with each new scenario?
We often get so used to drama-filled relationships that it becomes the norm in our life. It is not only familiar, it is addictive to have the highs and lows of these toxic people coming in and out of our day-to-day existence. This can extend into our jobs, our friendships and our family as well.
If you are always having to take a back seat to happiness because of the controlling people in your life, you have to know that it is your choice with whom you are attracting, right? It is not a coincidense, it is a programmed belief that this is all you deserve. This could have started in your childhood or your teen years and is an internal dialouge you may not even be aware of that is playing in your head.
We don’t always know that we are repeating bad habits
This can happen for a very long time until we finally understand there is just way too much drama and heartache for this to be normal. Sadly, some people play the victim and never take the time to get to the bottom of their repetitive relationship problems. If you are always crying or calling your friends about all the terrible ways you are being treated, then it is time to understand that “you are the common denominator” in your life choices.
No one else should ever be in charge of how you live your life.
It really makes so much more sense when you own “your stuff” and realize that you may need some guidance to set you on the right path to what a loving partnership should consist of. You might really not know because you may have never been in one. There is no shame in asking for help and it is never too late to change the course of your life.
Unfortunately, there are a lot of leaches out there who are always on the lookout for a vulnerable heart to control but they won’t gravitate to people who are confident and strong-willed.
Everyone should have boundaries! Here at 10 Things to be aware of in your relationship
- Take things slowly in the beginning and be aware of early lustful attractions. Sex and intimacy can mask the reality of the true picture.
- Make sure the relationship energy is reciprocated and that you are getting back just as much as you are giving. You must respect each other’s time.
- Do you both prioritize each other within your partnership?
- Are you compatible or always arguing due to not being on the same page in many aspects of your lives?
- Are they often jealous or angry with you? Do you feel like you are always walking on eggshells around them? Aggressive behavior of any kind should not be tolerated!
- Have they cheated on you? Has your trust been broken?
- How do they treat you around others? Are they proud of you or do they find ways to berate or disrespect you in public scenarios?
- Do they squash your accomplishments? Do they use a lot of sarcasm?
- Are they always the one in control and who makes all of the decisions in your partnership?
- Have you lost a big part of who you are in many of your relationships?
People come into our lives for many different reasons depending on what is going on in our life at that particular time
Our childhood friends often form some of the strongest bonds because of the unconditional love we have for each other in our younger years. We are usually more open and accepting at that time. (I am speaking in a general sense of course.)
We become a little more judgemental as we find our way through the trials and tribulations of becoming an adult. Our teen years can be very tough on our self-esteem as we all go through so many hormonal changes and emotions. We also have trouble setting the right boundaries because we aren’t really clear about what they are yet.
Having loving parents or a great role model will make all the difference with some of the choices you make. Friends can come and go during that time but it is important to understand the lessons as to why certain people are in your life at any given time. There is always a reason.
The key to any long-term friendship or love relationship is that it needs to nurtured by both people to maintain a reciprocated connection. Lopsided friendships/partnerships eventually fizzle out because one person is not giving enough energy to keep things in a trusting and safe place.
It takes work to sustain a close relationship but if you both continue to be on the same respectful page with each other, it will stand the test of time.
Private Consultation Dating or Relationship Questions for Sybersue? Please contact me via Fibler @ https://dearsybersue.fibler.app?lang=… and message me there to set up a video call, voice call, or and text appointment. Thank you!
Susan McCord @ Dear Sybersue YouTube – Dear Sybersue Facebook
Dear Sybersue Blog & Advice Column – Dear Sybersue Instagram
Rule one for dating my daughter and Zoom meetings, keep it above the waist.