Today on Dear Sybersue I discuss the topic: The Biggest Reason Your Relationships May Not be Working Out for You!
If someone can get away with having the best of both worlds when they are dating they will often take that route for a while, until they get bored. This is why you should always have some healthy boundaries in place!
Your self-respect is your #1 priority!
Sexual chemistry gets a lot of people in trouble in the early stages of meeting a new person. When those pheromones take over, your common sense can take a backseat to other things that may be going on. Ignoring “red flag behavioral issues” with how you are being treated, is often overlooked.
Get to know someone slowly before you jump into bed with them. Sleeping with someone too soon can keep you stuck in an intimacy rut that will not only control your body, but it will also mess with your mind.
You need to see if you are connected in other ways before you let sexual lust “own your actions” moving forward. You don’t know them yet so let’s find out if you even like who they are first!
They continually make excuses about not being able to see you or contact you.
When you allow someone to control how the relationship progresses by turning a blind eye to their continued excuses and behavior, you are setting yourself up to be in an unhealthy partnership. Don’t get caught up in the excitement of finally being in a relationship, that you put up with things that will eventually take a toll on your self-worth.
When someone keeps saying they are too busy to get together or constantly canceling plans, this is showing that they are not available or invested in having a committed partnership with you. (Even if they are really that busy then they probably shouldn’t be dating, at least not at your expense.)
Having to wait around for someone on the off chance that they will get a few hours free one day, is self-absorbed on their part and very dismissive of your time. Pay attention to being treated in this manner because this is the time to remove yourself from getting attached and ending up in another one-sided scenario.
Being accommodating is one thing but being overly available last minute is another thing altogether.
It’s OK if you don’t connect with everyone you date. This is totally normal. Meeting your potential partner is not an easy task but if you remove yourself early from people who are just playing with you, it will take much less time to bring you closer to finding your special person.
If you are being really honest with yourself, you KNOW when someone is there just for a good time. Listen closely to your instincts because it will save you a lot of heartache over the years.
When someone is into you they will do everything they can to see you. They don’t make excuses!
It is really. just. that. simple!
This is how you know when you are with the right person.
- There are no excuses about why they can’t see you, they show up in every way.
- They contact you regularly and make plans ahead of time.
- They text you back in a reasonable amount of time and put some thought into what they say.
- They communicate openly and they are emotionally available. They are not afraid to express their feelings.
- There are no games or drama and there is no ego power control.
- They respect your time as much as their own time.
- It’s not all about them! They actually care about what you think and how you feel.
- They do little things for you without you having to ask for help.
- They don’t bail on you last minute because something better came up.
- There is reciprocated romance and intimacy between the two of you. Your love making is a lot more than just a happy-ending booty call!
If you have found that you are not the priority in many of your past relationships it is time to realize that you are repeating a pattern that is giving you the same negative results. Sometimes it takes us a while to get it right, but eventually you will figure things out and understand the lessons you were supposed to learn.
Each time you venture out on a date, don’t bury or ignore those red flags that are showing themselves early on. This will not only save you from investing in the wrong partner, it will also bring you much closer to meeting the person you are meant to share your life with. <3
Please watch the video above to find out more about what you should be paying very close attention to when you are in the early stages of meeting someone new.
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