My Partner is Emotionally Cheating Outside of Our Relationship!
Many of us have close friends outside our relationships but is it OK to have a “deep emotional connection” with someone other than our partner?
How do you know if you are engaging in more than just a friendly conversation?
- Ask yourself if you would say those same things to your partner. Would they be upset knowing you were having this type of conversation with someone other than them?
- Are you being secretive about these discussions with your friend?
- Have the dynamics changed between you both from how things originally started out in your friendship?
- Is this emotional connection happening more often and taking away time from being with your partner?
- Have things changed with your sex life and intimacy at home? Have you lost interest?
- Do you find yourself pushing the boundaries within your relationship? In other words; taking more chances and telling small lies here and there?
- Has the discussion turned into a more flirty tone over the last while with this emotional connection?
- Are you more excited about conversing with them rather than your partner and really look forward to your conversations?
- Do you feel that you have more in common with them each time you see them or talk to them?
- Have you started to fantasize about kissing them or being sexual in any capacity with this person?
Why would someone have an emotional connection outside of their partnership?
- This can happen when they don’t feel they can be open with their partner. They gravitate to someone they can talk to.
- They do not feel heard or validated in their partnership.
- Their partner is too busy and they are fed up not being a priority. They feel lonely in their relationship.
- They are bored and looking for some excitement outside their home.
- A couple has stopped nurturing their relationship and it has become robotic and repetitive.
- There is very little communication due to a growing complacency within the partnership.
- There could be a temptation to act upon a colleague or friend’s flirty attention and excitement about having a piece of that forbidden fruit!
- They may have already checked out of the relationship and are starting to look around at their options.
Are you the third person outside of a relationship?
This type of situation is never a good place to allow yourself to be. You are NOT a priority, you are the 3rd wheel in a partnership. Regardless of the fact that you are not sleeping with them, (yet) having an emotional connection is still cheating.
Think about it; would you want your partner to be this close to someone outside your own personal committed relationship?
If they are lying to their partner on a daily basis how is that ever a good thing? Being a part of something like this isn’t fair to yourself or the couple involved. Everyone is being cheated out of something!
Even if things progressed between the two of you to more of an intimate scenario would you ever be able to trust them if they left their relationship? You know what they did to their partner and it can happen again to you down the road.
If someone can’t communicate with their partner, they need to learn how to or they need to move on without dragging someone else into the mix just to make themself feel better.
How do I keep my partner emotionally invested in me and our relationship?
- Don’t get lazy! You fell in love with them for a reason. Do not lose sight of why that was. A relationship needs to be nurtured regularly and it takes work to keep things close between a couple.
- Have fun together. Be playful with each other like a couple of kids! Plan weekly things to do together. Do not become routine and follow strict regimens. Loosen up!
- Sit down face to face and talk openly to each other every day. You need to have uninterrupted discussions that only involve the two of you. No kids, no household issues, just lighthearted conversations that keep you connected.
- Plan weekly date nights! Take turns planning a night out. Be creative and fun! Think a little outside the box to keep things interesting and exciting. You will both always have something to look forward to and it won’t allow you to become complacent as a couple. Keeping the energy alive keeps you evolving as a couple. <3
- Always take time to look good for yourself and your partner! Some couples lose that initial attraction they once had for each other. They stop putting effort into their appearance and their attitude, which ultimately changes the romance and the sexual desire. This is a relationship killer! Always be the best you can be in all aspects of your life. Keep them wanting more of you!
- Couple’s Counseling. If you are both starting to feel disconnected within your relationship it is always a great idea to have a counselor on speed dial before things become irreparable between the two of you. We all need a little guidance and support in our lives and asking for help is always a good thing. It can get you back on track with each other by having an unbiased point of view from someone professional outside your home.
I’d love to be able to say it is never too late to save your relationship but unfortunately sometimes it can be when a couple becomes complacent and just gives up trying. The grass isn’t always greener on the other side and many people tend to repeat a similar process in their next relationship anyway.
Communication is #1 in a partnership and is the glue to maintaining a long and healthy commitment. It helps keep everything in your relationship connected. If you are finding that sexual intimacy is also taking a back seat as the last priority, this could be the final red flag between you as a couple. Don’t let that happen.
Always pay attention to what is going on in your relationship and never be the last to know that your partnership is in trouble!! Please watch the video above to hear more about what I have to say and what you can do about this situation if it is happening to you.
Sybersue xo <3
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