Today on Dear Sybersue I discuss the question: Do You Ignore Your Inner Voice When it Comes to Dating and Relationships?
Here are 5 Things to Pay Attention to When Your Instincts are Sending You Messages:
1. Are you a little guilty of not listening to your gut instincts and maybe even your common sense when it comes to matters of the heart?
Are you finding that you are repeating dating or relationship patterns that never seem to work out very well? Your instincts, (or “spidey senses”) as I call them, are a wonderful guide to choosing the right options in your life. Unfortunately, we often ignore them, which makes our lives a lot more difficult in many cases.
If you pay close attention to those prickly feelings that try to lure you in the right direction, you will have much less drama and toxicity to deal with. Sometimes when you think you are “taking the exciting path” isn’t always the best choice to make. If your gut is telling you on a date that this person you are with is trouble, just interested in sex, or is not interested in having a relationship, it is important to listen to those warning whispers. Many men and women let the early sexual chemistry play out much louder than the intellectual voice inside their heads telling them to walk away.
I know for myself, that when I have ignored my gut and I have taken a different route, I feel very unbalanced. This is a true indication that I did not make the right decision because I feel very out of sorts and a little anxious.
The good thing is, now I know how to change it up quickly and get back onto the path that I am supposed to be on. You can train yourself to do this, but you first have to be aware of those uncomfortable instinctive feelings that are trying to reason with your opposing mindset. Some people just don’t hear them or see the problems that come from making unhealthy patterned choices.
2. You should always veer toward what you are truly passionate about because that is where you are supposed to be
Regardless of whether you are passionate about your career, your relationship, or both, the road will always be a little bumpy getting to your goals and achieving your dreams. No one is disputing that, and it is nothing to be afraid of because that is what makes you grow and become stronger as a person. This is what makes you exciting to be around because you have things to share as you continue to evolve in your life.
When you truly know what it is that you want now, and in your future, you should spend more energy on making it happen. We can get very caught up in giving our time to things that aren’t always great for us. This can usually stem from naivety or a familiar scenario that we have become accustomed to. Just because something familiar may seem comfortable and easier, it is not necessarily a great scenario to repeat. Always listen to your inner guide to take you in the right direction.
3. When certain things don’t work out in your life, does it make sense to go back in for some more of the same?
Wouldn’t it be much better to sit down and analyze what transpired during that tough period and make some new plans moving forward? Wouldn’t this be a smart time to trust those powerful instincts? When you reflect back on some of those questionable decisions you made, can you now hear those warning voices loud and clear? You’re not stifling them anymore because you have more clarity away from the problem that caused you the stress or heartache.
I get asked by some clients how I can help them get their Ex back. My job is more about helping men and women come to an understanding of why they broke up in the first place. We often think we were happy before someone broke our hearts, but the truth is, the majority of people aren’t fulfilled in their partnerships at this point.
You don’t walk away from a great relationship, and there are usually some signs for both people as a couple to see, before it comes to the final demise. You just need to learn how to trust your instincts earlier on a date, or when you’re in a new partnership. Slow things down and take time away from those captivating pheromones! This is what gets many people in trouble and temporarily blinds our common sense.
There could always be the odd situation where you really messed up in a partnership, and you wish you could take back what happened, but that may just be “your lesson” to learn. Second chances don’t always happen, but it is really important to see the big part you played in a breakup. Unfortunately, you may not see this until your ex has already moved on with someone else. This is another reason that it is so important to pay close attention to your own thoughts during your relationship, as well as listening to your partner’s concerns.
A partnership is not one-sided, and it takes two very committed people to keep the love flowing. You know in your gut when something is off, so don’t ignore those signs, no matter how trivial you think they may be. If you are aware of your surroundings, and you are communicative and understanding with each other, it is so much easier to get things back on track together when you do have a few issues to deal with in your relationship.
4. Don’t settle for anything less than what your instincts are trying to help guide you toward.
Red flags are put on your path as big warning signs, so don’t ignore them. When you stop and take the time to listen to your inner voice, you will usually take “the path of least resistance,” which makes your life so much smoother!
If you are finding that things continually do not work out for you in the love department, it is time to sit down and be honest about what you may be doing wrong when it comes to meeting the true partner that you desire. What are you not listening to? If something is nagging at you, it is time to hear the message.
5. Think back to a breakup you had in the past
Looking back, can you now see that there were signs telling you that you weren’t a good fit with an Ex, or that things had changed between you? We are often in denial and don’t own up to these issues until a year or so after our heart is broken, and we are no longer together. There are usually a few big things that showed up in your relationship that were problematic, but you might have thought ignoring them was an easier option. Putting anything important on the back burner is never a good idea. Things need to always be resolved, not shut inside a cupboard never to be pulled out again.
This behavior is so wrong and is such a big reason why so many couples don’t evolve to a higher place of love with one another. If you don’t listen to your internal voice of reason or hear your partner’s concerns as well, there is a disconnect that continues to grow between you until it eventually pushes you completely away from each other.
Your instincts are your best guide. Once you learn how to hear the messages loud and clear, your life will be full of positive choices and a much easier pathway. Things will flow and just seem to fit together without any negativity. You are always going to run into circumstances that may cause you to question things, but taking the time to quietly listen to what your internal voice is sharing with you, will help alleviate unnecessary drama in your life.
*Thank you so much for visiting here today! Please click on the video above to hear more about today’s topic, and please leave a comment below. I love to hear from you!
Sybersue xo <3
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