When we first fall in love with someone it is a euphoric feeling that is very addictive & holds our emotions hostage.
Suddenly life is wonderful & we can’t stop smiling regardless of other obstacles that we may be dealing with in our day to day existence. All those little problems seem to dissolve and seem trivial because our heart is so full.
Love is powerful & affects all of us in some way during our lifetime.
Love comes in many forms and it is important how grateful and appreciative we are of this “gift,” that will allow us to keep receiving an abundance of it. <3
Unfortunately, many factors come into play that can make us go a little crazy when things aren’t flowing in the direction that we want our love relationships to go. It can make us react in ways we aren’t even capable of comprehending. “Who the Hell am I and why am I behaving like this?”
Why does this four-letter word change our behavior so much?
Love rules our hearts and our hearts don’t always lead us in the right direction. Our reactions towards someone we are attracted to can be premature or not well thought out. It is an addictive endorphin and like any drug, it can make people act out of character.
Why does love turn some people into Dr. Jeckle & Mr. Hyde?
- Jealousy is the biggest reason! This can be due to a lack of self-esteem and a fear of losing them to someone else.
- Past insecurities ingrained from childhood issues.
- Narcissist behavior: Wanting control over the relationship and their partner.
- Envy (Their partner is very popular, has a better career or they are more confident.)
- Their partner is sexually attractive to others which can bring out insecurities in the relationship.
- Lack of trust. They were cheated on in a past relationship or with their current partner.
- The partnership is lopsided with one person more invested than the other.
How far would you go to change for someone?
If your partner preferred blondes over your natural hair color would you change it for them? Would you shave off your beard? Go on a diet because they think you need to lose weight? Would you change careers to please them? Would you move to another city for them? Would you engage in sexual fetishes for them?
If you are constantly being harassed about changing who you are physically, mentally or spiritually, this is unacceptable behavior & surpasses any red flag query that you may have.
They are not your person!
How much should you alter yourself to appease someone you love?
Compromise and communication are the two big C words in a healthy relationship.
Doing the little things for each other is very important so that you are naturally more compatible and loving within your relationship. Taking up a new sport together, planning weekly date nights, compromising on the home décor & vacation choices is welcomed and very appreciated in a partnership.
Love isn’t just about your own personal needs, it is about sharing your life with someone and wanting to be there for them.
Of course, your individuality should always be maintained and your partner should be a wonderful extension of who you already are. This needs to be reciprocated for a couple to evolve together. Being your true authentic self will keep the love and respect alive in your partnership for many years to come.
Jealousy can make you do crazy things when you are in love!
Some people have gone to great lengths to make someone jealous or get back at them because they were jealous. Is it really because they truly love that person or is because they want their undivided attention and they are feeling rejected?
Whatever the case, jealousy is based on insecurities and is never a good thing. When a couple is in a great place together they do not have the desire to play dangerous mind games or take turns being in the power seat of the relationship.
Desperate to Hold on To a Partner
We have all heard about or experienced manipulative tactics to keep someone in a “dying relationship” scenario. The big question is; why would you want to force someone into loving you?
If love is not reciprocated it is not true love.
Many people do not know how to be alone & this becomes a fear that makes them do desperate things. Rejection is another powerful demon that plays havoc on people’s egos. Both sexes need to take time to reflect & calm down before they react to a hurtful situation. Retaliation is usually regretted when acted upon in anger.
Manipulative Things People Have Done For Love
• Physically hurting themselves to get their partner’s attention.
• Trying to make their partner feel sorry for them.
• Stalking them when they are out with others or after a break-up.
• Reading their emails & texts due to lack of trust!
• Keeping their partner’s friends away so they have total control without interference.
• Holding a damaging secret over their partner.
• Threaten to make their life Hell if their partner leaves them.
Can “Doing Crazy Things For Love” be a good thing in a relationship?
There are numerous things that may be categorized as crazy but some of them can be a fun way to add excitement to a relationship. It depends on how you define the word crazy.
Doing something “off the wall” that is playfully out of character can keep the fires burning at home. It shows spontaneity and creativity to think of innovative ways to enhance your partnership.
Love will never grow old if complacency is removed from a long term relationship.
Having realistic expectations will also help your relationship stay on a healthy path. Listen to each other, compromise on activities & social outings and never try to control or manipulate your partner.
If a couple always puts each other first there won’t be room for games or any other BS. The respect will always be there leaving the insecurities “behind,” right where they should be in a loving and balanced relationship.
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Susan McCord The Dear Sybersue Advice Show