Relationship Advice for Men & Women ~ The Living Together Checklist: Is it Time to Move In Together?

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We are very compatible but should we move in together?

Do couples really take enough time going over the “Living Together Checklist” before they decide to move in together? This list is a necessary tool to use when making such a committed decision.

Important questions to ask yourself:

  • How long have you known each other & do you really “know” them?
  • Why have you decided to live together?
  • How are your finances?
  • Is living together a matter of convenience or do you truly love your partner?
  • Are you moving in due to long distance relationship issues?
  • Do you know and love their quirks?
  • Are you settling due to your advancing age or fear of being alone?
  • Are you ready? (Believe it or not that is the biggest question of all!)
  • Where will you live together?  (You both have to be happy with this decision and it is always better if it is a neutral home you have chosen together and not one that either of you live in at the time ~ for obvious reasons.)

What should you be looking for in a reciprocated partnership and are you both looking for the same things down the road?

Have you discussed what your future roommate will be bringing into your shared home?  Do they have children?  Do they have big responsibilities due to pets or a dependent mother or father?  Home decorating can be a difficult compromise. She may be partial to pink ruffled pillows & lace curtains and want to renovate the den into a shoe closet, while he wants to hang his photo of “The Godfather” over the living room fireplace, prefers burlap beanbag chairs and wants to install full length ceiling mirrors & a swing in the bedroom.  (What’s wrong with that?  Come on ladies you really should be more flexible!)

What city do you want to reside in and are you OK if you or your partner might have to relocate due to a career situation?  Will this be a problem?  How do you get along with their family and if they don’t live in your vicinity will they be staying with you while visiting?  (Remember the movies Monster in Law & Meet the Fockers!)

Do you both want children?  How many and when would you like to start a family?  Is marriage a priority for either of you?  It is important to know that you are both on the same page with this and be really up front with your answer.  No sugar coating the answers if you are not into it or not going to be ready for 5 years.  Be fair to your partner and don’t just say what you think they want to hear.  There are many stories out there with this being a big problem ending in breakups and resentment.

Here is an important thing to discuss; what are the sexual expectations of your relationship?

Things can change drastically when you see each other every day.  It’s no longer quite as exciting as the early chase of a new love. You both have to work a little harder to keep the sex and intimacy exciting!  It really helps to keep things fresh when don’t see each other every evening.  Make plans once a week with friends so that your partner has time to miss you. Couples are happier when they don’t feel restrained in a relationship.  Talk about sex before you move in together, not after.  Discuss it outside the bedroom so there is no pressure in the heat of the moment.  Be really honest about what is important to you to ensure you are both comfortable about your desires and expectations in the love making department.  I shouldn’t have to say this but make sure you are sexually attracted to them and not just acting out the part because you want a committed partnership.  Sex and money are the two biggest reasons for the demise of a relationship!

You should not have to give up your hobbies or fitness regimens.  Having the occasional separate outing is healthy.  It gives you something different to talk about with your partner.  Cohabitating can be a lot of fun when you respect each other’s boundaries and appreciate the differences you both bring into the relationship.  Compromise is the key to longevity with most couples and so is a great sex life.  You’re not single anymore so don’t live that way in your partnership. There are two of you now.  Planning week long adventures on a monthly basis, golfing all weekend or making last minute plans without them will eventually lead to hurt and resentment.  The romance is not over the minute you sign a lease or the mortgage papers, it is even more important now than ever if you want to live in a happy environment.  So many people forget that simple part to help keep the love alive.  Small gestures go a long way in preserving love & happiness long term.

Many relationships break-up when the little aggravations are not addressed, also known as “irreconcilable differences!”

Some people really do sweat the small stuff in a partnership and can be quite high maintenance with their daily regimen. For starters, it is always a good idea to have two bathrooms in your communal pad due to obvious reasons.  Men have six bathroom items on their counter and they use I roll of toilet paper a month.  Women have 500 toiletry items and go through a 10 pack roll of 4 ply in a week!  (OK maybe that’s just at my house!)  Other things like towels on the floor, hair in the tub, remnants in the toilet, toothpaste on the mirror and lingerie hanging from the shower rod can eventually end a relationship due to constant bickering or lack of respect for each other’s space!

It’s not a bad idea to do a trial living arrangement  first.  This will tell you many things about each other.  Is someone more territorial in this new environment?  Are they easy going or controlling?  Discussing the living together checklist”  before you actually commit to it can be a really good training ground.  Communicating and paying attention to even the smallest details could save you many arguments and heartbreak as you work through them together.  It is easy to be attracted to someone and even love them, but it is not always easy to share your living environment with another person.  Even if the sex is unbelievable, it is not usually enough to sustain a partnership especially as the years wear on ~ you need to really like each other as well!  Coming home to someone you love everyday is a wonderful feeling and worth every moment of taking time to get to know them beforehand.

Susan McCord @ http://www.youtube.com/twobeavers

Our “Glass Half Full” Golf Experience with an “Exceptional” Pair of Guys!

Originally posted on Dear Sybersue ~ Dating & Relationship Advice:

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As a regular blogger & advice columnist I am usually pretty optimistic and open minded when it comes to life in general ~ I am a “glass half full” kind of girl for the most part. I do believe that many people you come across in life are there for a reason to teach you simple or valuable lessons…or is it for you to teach them?  The Jury is out on that one but regardless it is an interesting theory just the same.  

I have always used this approach with men that I have dated in the past, which has helped me move on faster after a breakup. I analyzed what I was supposed to learn from these scenarios to help me with my future choices. I tried not to let my ego take over every time I got dumped and to thank them instead for helping me get…

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Dating Advice ~ Are You Tired of Being Single?

Dear Sybersue is a Dating/Relationship/Lifestyle Advice Talk Show for Men & Women of all Ages!  Host Susan McCord discusses why you may still be single and how to change that!  Dating patterns need to be altered so that you can find a loving partnership.  Understanding how you play a part with your actions is the first step to getting there.

Many people are hurt, fed up or angry that they are not in a relationship but are also in denial as to why this is a constant in their lives. I truly feel that this is why dating has become a difficult place these days.  If we all just point fingers at each other blaming our past situations on what the future will continue to be like, we are going to be very lonely for a long time.

If something isn’t working why don’t you try everything to fix it if it is important to you?

YouTube and other social media has become a complaint center for many people regarding relationship or dating issues.  It is a place that they can openly state their view point anonymously which many choose to do.  Venting their frustration is one thing but not trying to find a solution is another thing.  Learning from our mistakes in life help us grow into better people but holding onto them and not improving who we are, is just prolonging the same old thing over and over again.

None of us are perfect and we all make some bad choices but those who move away from this repetitive negative cycle will find happiness faster.  Stop blaming others for how things turn out as it is “you” that ultimately makes the decisions in your life not them. <3

Susan McCord ~ http://www.youtube.com/twobeavers

Dating Advice: Best Tips on How to Entice a Woman

#TBT #talkshow #datingadvice #datingtips #howtoenticeawoman #Vancouvertalkshow

Do men really know how to entice a woman that they are interested in?

Many men are confused about what to do these days with so many independent women out there! These simple tips will get you talking to the woman of your dreams. Don’t be shy guys and let her slip away never to be seen again. Be proactive and make it happen. We all spend so much time saying “what if” when we should be saying “why not!”

Susan McCord ~ http://www.youtube.com/twobeavers

A “Shout Out” to YouTube’s Matthew Hussey at gettheguyteam!

There are many times in life where we meet someone who inspires us but how often do we tell them they have made an impact in our world?  We need to appreciate each other and not give into envy, jealousy or frustration because someone is doing well in life.  They should be viewed as a mentor and held in high regard because most of them have worked very hard to get where they are.  Learn from them and be happy for their accomplishments because just maybe a little of their happiness will rub off on you.  Positive light, attracts positive light back! <3

Dating Relationship Lifestyle Talk Show Host Susan McCord gives a “shout Out” to Mathew Hussey!  His YouTube Channel “gettheguyteam” has 208,292 subscribers and 31,437,891 views! Matthew is is a speaker, New York Times Bestselling author of the book GetTheGuy, and founder of one of the largest dating advice websites in the world http://www.gettheguy.co.uk/  You Rock Matthew!! <3

Matthew Hussey @ http://www.youtube.com/gettheguyteam
Susan McCord @ http://www.facebook.com/DatingRelationshipTalkShow

Are you Addicted to Online Dating?

Many people only date through online resources. This is mainly due to age, time and busy careers. (You don’t even have to dress for the occasion unless you’re socializing with them through a Web cam.) It is almost too easy and this is what causes the addiction. It can be very exciting for some people who have always had a minimal personal life. All of a sudden they are getting 5 to 10 e-mails a day from prospective dates! Hello! What’s not to like??

Susan McCord @ http://www.youtube.com/twobeavers

Dear Sybersue ~ Should I Leave my Long Term Relationship to go to School in Another City?

Dear Sybersue Talk Show host Susan McCord answers Maria’s question if she should leave her boyfriend of 3 years to go to to school in another city. She has broken up with him 5 times but keeps going back.

What should she do?

Susan McCord @ http://www.youtube.com/twobeavers

Sybersue on Facebook @ http://www.facebook.com/DatingRelationshipTalkShow