Dating Advice for Men: Understanding Women 101

Sex & The City Night

This is a conversation that I have with men all over the world.  It doesn’t matter what age they are the questions are the same.

  • How do we know when a woman is interested when you first meet them?
  • Why are men & women so different?
  • What should men know about women?
  • What is she thinking?

How Do You Know When A Woman Is Interested When You First Meet Them?

She makes eye contact! If she locks eyes with you across the room for more than 3-5 seconds she has noticed you. Her body language is flirty and fun. She may appear a little shy and fidget with her hair or her food/drink. She smiles but may look away often out of nervousness because she is attracted to you!

What do you do?

Go over and say hi if you are interested. Acknowledge her. Don’t turn away and ignore her or she will move on.  She may not be there for long so don’t waste your opportunity while it is there.

Be the initiator if she smiles back. Many women are nervous around someone they are attracted to. (It’s always harder to talk to people you have a crush on regardless of which sex you are.)

If you introduce yourself to her with a handshake, do not do it in a gentle or wimpy way.  Women love your masculinity.  A strong handshake with eye contact is usually an indication of a confident man.

Don’t wait 2 hours to talk with woman you have been eyeing from across the room. It shows a lack of assertiveness or strength. Men worry too much about rejection and lose many great opportunities from fear of “what if she isn’t interested in me?” She doesn’t know you yet so don’t worry if things don’t pan out in the initial conversation. That’s OK, if it’s not a great connection. You tried and that is a good thing.

Why Are Men & Women So Different?

Men have fairly simple needs while women can be a little more complicated. We are definitely more emotional and quite often have different expectations than men when it comes to matters of the heart.. This is especially true where our family & home are concerned. (Women were given the reproductive organs for a reason due to our nurturing nature & mama bear tendencies to protect our loved ones.)

Our hormones can interfere with our moods at different times of the month or different stages in our lives such as, pregnancy, during a menstrual cycle or during later years in menopause. It is not easy for women to have to go through all these constant scenarios & many men do not know how to deal with the onset of these hormonal changes. Life is much more rewarding for the man who takes the time to understand the complications of the female anatomy and work with it rather than against it. Women do not want to be complicated, believe me!

Men like to problem solve alone while women like to share theirs. Many men also think about sex more often than women do and usually care more about looks than most women do.  Most women are more forgiving when it comes to physical attraction towards men but they will never forget an argument or anything a man says for the most part.

They love shoes! (Don’t even try to understand this.)

What Are Some Things That Men Should Know About Women?

  • When getting to know someone you like, don’t leave more than 2-3 days to call them after a date. They want to know you are interested and that they are on your mind. Calling a week or two later doesn’t make a woman feel special. In fact; a man that takes the time to call or email that same evening or the following day will be held in high esteem. Why play the waiting game if you are interested? (Remind yourself of the one that got away because you didn’t act fast enough. We all have one of those in our lives!)
  • When women ask how your weekend or day was, they really appreciate it when you want to confide them. They want you to feel secure that you can tell them the good & bad details. Women like to help; men like to fix things.
  • Try not to cancel plans at the last minute but if you have to, immediately set up a time to make it up to her. You have ruined her evening so apologize & put something on the calendar in the next few days that make her understand that you feel bad and respect her time.
  • Women really like to receive a note, playful text, birthday/special occasion greeting card or a small thoughtful gift for no reason. (Cards mean a lot more to women than men realize ~ we keep them forever!)  It is the little efforts men make that women remember forever & brag about to their girlfriends.
  • Notice her hair cut or when she wears a new outfit for you. The more enthusiasm you show her, she will become bolder & sexier. You will be reaping the benefits & probably have a better sex life too! Women love to be adored by their man. It gives them confidence in all areas but especially the bedroom!
  • When out on a date, do not constantly look around the room. If you are ADHD or easily distracted, pick a seat where you are staring at a wall and not the comings and goings around you. Make her feel like she is the center of your world even if it is only for one night.  Attentiveness is an aphrodisiac!
  • No groping or too much PDA on the first few dates. It can come across needy, desperate or lecherous. Female attraction towards you is based on many of your behaviors.
  • Some women do like NICE guys but not submissive ones. There is a difference!
  • Women like a little mystery, confidence, romance & a sense humor. Use them all!

What Is She Thinking?

If a woman is quieter than normal and her body language is stiff or removed from you, ask her what is bothering her. Women feel weak when they are overly emotional. Once she feels she can talk to you & that you are listening, she will then start to open up. Women need to talk when something is disturbing them; don’t ignore it for long or it may escalate into something bigger down the road. Show her you care.

A woman continually gives hints about things she likes & enjoys. Observing & listening to her is one of the best things a man can do. It stops a lot the guessing game in the early stages because it shows he is interested in what makes her happy. It is also easier to make plans for dates ahead.

Some women can be dramatically emotional & high maintenance. Be aware of how much this happens & how long it continues to monopolize the relationship. We all have our moods but when it becomes a daily occurrence, it is an unhealthy place to be for both of you.

The Bottom Line For Both Sexes:

Do not lose a wonderful opportunity to meet an amazing person by not taking a chance in saying hello to someone you are attracted to or give up too soon because you can’t be bothered.  Dating doesn’t have to be a complex situation; it can be fun & very rewarding. Don’t make quick judgment calls without giving people a chance. We all have our insecurities & no one is immune to being a little shy or awkward when they first meet someone. Go out and talk to each other & make assumptions after meeting them, not before.

Both sexes have their quirks and differences but that is a good thing. If we were all alike and understood every little thing about each other it would eventually become repetitive and boring. Embrace the differences each sex brings to the table and enjoy it!

Susan McCord @

Advice for Men & Women ~ Why Do People Give Ultimatums in a Relationship?

ultimatum photo of womenRelationship ultimatums- Why do people do this?

Why are there so many people in forced relationships today?  Is it the fear of being alone? Are men & women settling into a partnership because it is the best scenario for that moment or they got coerced into it?  Sharing your life with someone you love can be a difficult commitment but living with someone you just “like,” will erupt over time due to boredom. Compatibility & chemistry are needed tools to keep a relationship fresh & alive!  Of course friendship is a big necessity as well but the other two components need to be there to keep the sex & love nurtured and forever blossoming.

Generally speaking, there seems to be a maximum “two year deadline” for women who want a marriage commitment from their partner. Ultimatums are a common discussion at this time of the relationship. Most men do not respond well to this & view it as a threat which ultimately it is. It backs them into a corner that they are not really ready to discuss, otherwise they would have already.

“Marry me or I am leaving.” Women that resort to this scare tactic have not been paying attention to the relationship’s red flags. If she has to have this conversation with her man, there is a problem that she has not noticed or is deliberately ignoring. Relationships that are on the right path do not need to be pushed into commitments as they naturally flow to that place all on their own.  It is a natural and reciprocated progression.

( I know some of you are thinking that there are some men who give women ultimatums as well and you’re right, but it’s just not quite as often.)

Occasionally (and I use the word lightly) an ultimatum can work for some people because they might need a wake up call! They may have been a little afraid of the next step of moving in together, an engagement or fearful of a more committed phase in the relationship due to past history or a divorce situation. They also could have just been very comfortable & happy where they were in the partnership and didn’t want to change anything.  By bullying someone into marriage or house hunting when they are not ready usually leads to the demise of the relationship out of resentment later on.

If you feel the need to have to say something to them to kick start the conversation, choose your words carefully and say it only once to them. Don’t repeat it over and over again.  Ask them what their future plans are? Do they see themselves with you long term? Do they want a family with you? Really listen to what they have to say and then make your decision on whether to stay in the relationship or move on to find love with someone who is ready for the same things you are.  Don’t wait for 2 years to ask those important questions. You should know you are on the same path within the first 6-9 months in your partnership.

10 Red Flags to Watch for with Commitment Phobic Partners:

  1. They go out 3 or more nights a week without you.
  2. Plan most of their vacations with friends & exclude you!
  3. Talk about buying a place alone.
  4. Do not open up with you on an emotional level or share many of their thoughts.
  5. They have many friends and family in the same city you have never met.
  6. After a year together, they still say “I” instead of “we.”
  7. No mention of plans for the future as a couple or make excuses about having a career deadline and need to focus on that first before making any other major commitments!
  8. They talk about moving to another city or big travel plans that do not include you.
  9. There is very little romance and the sex is robotic.
  10. They seldom tell you they love you!

Being aware of your part in the relationship & how it is progressing should not be overlooked. Mutual love & support should be naturally occurring as the partnership grows. If it is stagnant & predictable early on, the chances of a happy future with this person will probably not happen. Deciding to ignore the signs is limiting your happiness and cheating you out of a wonderful future with someone more compatible.

After 6 months, the (right or wrong) signs are usually laid out and obvious in the relationship to those who are paying attention. We date for a reason; to find out if two people fit together & can ultimately have a loving future together as a couple. Being aware and listening to your inner self will help you make wise & fulfilling choices towards meeting that wonderful partner you can’t wait to spend your life growing old with. When it’s right you don’t need to use ultimatums.

Susan McCord

Relationship Advice: Right Person, Wrong Time? Maybe Not!

FullSizeRender (11)Was your vision impaired years ago when you let the love of your life get away??

Meeting an amazing person at the wrong time has probably happened to most people at one time in their lives. How often do we hear of couples reuniting at a high school reunion 20 -30 years later? That lost love that got away because the timing wasn’t right?

Was it really bad timing or was it really just the wrong person? Understanding the difference is really important here because you can spend years pining over someone whom you thought was the right person that got away, only to see them again and apart from a physical attraction, there really wasn’t much else.  Knowing when it is purely a physical lust or true love, is the answer to your haunting question. When love is wonderful, it doesn’t have to be difficult or complicated.  It just feels right and the relationship adjustments are not obstacles but reciprocated compromises.

In our younger years many people are focusing on their career path or University schooling and meeting someone at that stage in your life is usually more of a casual relationship. This time is for “you to grow” so that you make wise choices for your future.  But…what if you met someone then that was perfect for you and you let them get away because the timing just wasn’t right?  You can’t stop thinking about them! Should you contact them? Absolutely; but find out as much as you can beforehand in case they are happily married with children.  Do not cause an upset in their life just because you made a mistake years ago by letting them go.  If they are single then jump in with both feet! What have you got to lose?

We all make choices for what we think the better path, but is it?

Are we just too busy, stubborn or self absorbed to see what an incredible relationship we have at the time?  Timing is everything and sometimes we don’t pay attention to what is obvious and right in front of us. How many people have let the right person get away due to other priorities & then choose the wrong person later on out of desperation because they don’t want to end up alone?

Age can play an important factor in your choices;  especially if you are a woman whose biological clock is ticking like a time bomb.  Some women will forfeit love to get pregnant at that stage. Dating checklists can also be relationship killers due to the picky or shallow demands some people prioritize.  Sometimes we do not know they are the right person until they are gone from our lives because we let our blinders dictate our decisions!

People talk about their soul mate that got away.  Is there such a person for everyone? Maybe, but if we let them get away were they really your soul mate? Shouldn’t you be joined at the hip and nothing can tear you apart? 

Many men and women who were overly critical and ultra non-committal until their late 30’s, eventually settle with a partner they may not even love.  This is sad and everyone needs to look in the mirror as a reminder that we all have good qualities and we all have flaws.  No one is immune to this so being particular and snobby in your single years is really not worth it in the end. I can’t tell you how many very lonely people ( in relationships or out of them) I have met over the years that have screwed up potential happiness with their judgmental attitudes.

It is never too late to change and if you do feel like you are repeating a pattern due to your unreasonable checklists, it could be your own commitment issues sabotaging any potential relationship.  Take the time to rediscover yourself and own your part in why things haven’t worked out for you to be in a loving partnership. Hire a dating coach and put yourself around friends that have a healthy relationship. Being in a warm environment like this can help alleviate these long term fears by seeing how wonderful a great relationship can be.

I do believe that timing is everything & when you are ready you will allow that “right” person in.” Don’t ever be afraid to rekindle a lost love if the opportunity arises as it will either open or close a door that has been stagnant for way too long.

<3 Love can happen anywhere, anytime and at any age! <3

Susan McCord @

Finding Love: 10 Tips to Help Change Your Dating Patterns

Two Hearts Become One

Two Hearts Become One

I have have received quite a few  emails from men writing my advice column lately with the same dating question. It seems that many men are perturbed with women & their mixed signals. The women seem to be very interested in the beginning but then start to act disinterested or start playing hard to get by being unavailable or too busy!  There has been 8 men corresponding with me regularly from different parts of the world asking me to help them figure out why their dating life is such a problem. They are meeting women online for the most part but two of them are in toxic relationships with women they met through a friend’s introduction.

The common scenario and why these men are all having a similar dating problem is because they are choosing very high maintenance women who have a sense of entitlement attitude. They are so attracted to their physical appearance that they can’t see anything else.  So how’s that working for them?  It’s not!!  I have to say though, they have all been very receptive to my colorful comments and I am impressed at how open they are when I give them honest feedback. They were really listening and trying to get past this shallow place of choosing women strictly for their beauty. They admitted it was like an addiction and hard not to repeat the same scenario.

Without going into detail about their personal issues here are a few of the things the men have shared with me about their experiences with the women they have dated.

  • The women walk all over the men and take advantage of their nice guy persona.
  • Their expectations are way over the top with regards to the men paying for everything.
  • The women are evasive about seeing them again or setting up a future date, but seem really interested!
  • They act hot and cold. One day they are super affection the next day they are almost dismissive.
  • Use sex as a manipulating tool!

So what is the problem here and isn’t this the same thing that women complain about with regards to dating men?

Both men & women want the same things but they don’t often realize that. It is very interesting how alike we are when it comes to love. Here are some of the checklist priorities that you should adhere too when dating someone.

Advice To Both Sexes:

  1. Always leave a little bit of mystery about who you are. You don’t need to put your heart, body & soul on the table with every potential partner on the first few dates. Being too accommodating and overly available can be a big turn off in the early stages!
  2. Do not ever put yourself as number two (taking a backseat to another person etc. If they are too busy or still getting out of a past relationship, move on.)
  3. Respect their time;  being late or canceling last minute is rude and should not be tolerated!
  4. Do not lead anyone on if you are not interested in them. Seeing someone because you do not want to be alone is selfish and insecure.
  5. Putting yourself out there too early sexually can send out a different signal than you may want. Sex changes expectations.
  6. Watch how picky your checklist is! Would you want to meet someone with your outrageous demands?”
  7. Go out on at least 2 dates before you make your decision. Many people are shy, nervous or reserved when first meeting someone. Give them a chance!
  8. Being too clingy or overly affectionate is a sign of control or insecurity, so be careful how touchy/feely you are in the beginning. Don’t bombard them with texts either!!
  9. Both sexes should offer to pay or at least contribute every few dates. Women should not assume it is always the man’s duty. And guys…don’t complain about high maintenance women if you keep choosing them. They aren’t hiding anything so it is your choice to be there. Go with it or get out but don’t paint all women with the same brush.
  10. If something is uncomfortable or bothering either sex during the date, it should be discussed & not left to fester. Communication is the key to a good relationship.

It is very important to always respect yourself first. How you act on those first few dates is setting a precedent on how things will be expected each time you see them. If you try too hard, come across needy or you are willing to pull out your wallet at every given chance; you are setting yourself up for a repetitive dating pattern. Own your part in why things are not working out the way you would like and  things will start to change for you and your dating life. If you are constantly exasperated with either meeting the wrong people or not dating at all, there is something within yourself that you are doing to sabotage your happiness.  It is never too late to change what isn’t working and find the love you deserve. <3

Susan McCord @ Dear Sybersue Talk Show

How to Get Over an Abrupt Relationship Breakup

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How to Get Over an Abrupt Breakup? Blow them a kiss goodbye and thank them!

This topic came to me in an e-mail from a young guy who watches my show on YouTube.  He recently got the Dear John Text from his girlfriend of 6 months with no warning but his positive attitude surprised me!!  He said yes I am sad that it is over as I really enjoyed my time with her but “what choice do I have but to just move on? ‘No’ means ‘NEXT’,” were his words.  While this is much easier said than done for most people,  it is always better to be realistic about why it ended abruptly.  When a relationship ends it can be very painful but some breakups really do only warrant a small acknowledgment of hurt, resentment, rejection or hibernation.  In other words, why spend too much time pining over someone who is disrespectful enough to send you a breakup text and simply doesn’t want to be with you?

Most of the hurt that occurs from a breakup is due to our own egos, and not always our actual love for the person that left us.  Especially if it was a short-lived relationship.

Why harbor sadness or anger with someone who didn’t have the decency to say goodbye to you in person? Be thankful they are gone. Of course if you were in a two-year-plus relationship, your heart is more invested and it is not as easy to let go. You shouldn’t be able to say goodbye that easily but if you can, then you need to re-evaluate how you spend your time and your relationship choices. Staying in a long term partnership when you are not really into it, is not fair to them or yourself.

I have one male friend who went into a depression with every break-up, even if it was only a very short time spent with them. It has caused a lot of heartache over the years for him. He was in a dating pattern of constantly choosing the wrong women because he was blinded by one thing; their beauty!  He was looking for a commitment or so he said but all his actions spoke the opposite!  He had so much emotional baggage due to the fact that he was not dealing with why the breakups were happening or the repetitive choices he was making. With each new woman he dated, it  became harder to clean up the demons he was accumulating.  He finally discovered that he had a problem with rejection stemming from his childhood with a very unemotional mother who never showed him love of any kind. After much heartbreak and finally receiving some counselling, he came to understand why he made the shallow choices that he did, but it took him 20 years to get it!

Learning how to respect yourself first will make you move on faster or not allow you to be there in the first place.

Feeling like “the victim” in a breakup will only prolong your pain and make you angry. You can’t make someone love you! The hardest thing to grasp is that they are over you . You were dismissed, so to speak. We all think that we will never have another perfect relationship like the one that has just ended, but if it were so wonderful you would still be together. Know that you will have another relationship and it will be a better one down the road. You just can’t see it now because your ego is hurt.

Things don’t just fall apart for no reason.

It wasn’t meant to be and The Universe is trying to help you, probably because you weren’t taking the subtle hints it was throwing at you for the last 3 months. (Like when she/he took that 2nd vacation without you or they still haven’t given you a set of house keys after 2 years together.)

Moving on in other areas of your life will help with your relationships too.  Remember that job that was so difficult to go to everyday and then all of sudden they gave your pink slip, due to so-called downsizing (or some other term companies use today to protect themselves from a wrongful-dismissal suit) but in the end they actually did you a favor because you are now in a job that you really love. How many times has it NOT worked for the better? Change is always fearful, even if it is something we are ready for.  Many people become creatures of habit as they get older. Reminds me of the movie GROUNDHOG DAY! Let’s not become this routine-obvious boring person. Life needs some stability and normalcy but it doesn’t have to be a bad movie.  Keep your mind fresh and free. People will always gravitate towards energy.

The word “NEXT” should have excitement written all over it and should be embraced into your everyday life with optimism.  It is meant to make you grow and become more of who you are at the time. You should never stop growing with each approaching birthday. Complacency and boredom are the real killers, not old age~

Sometimes life becomes more of a struggle when we don’t register that something is too much work and all-consuming. The reason being it is not meant to be.  Your intuition will always lead you in the right direction in a relationship. When you are sad, depressed or insecure in a partnership these are red flags that should not be ignored.  When you have a reciprocated love it isn’t a lot of work, it just feels right. There is no drama or questions!  So the next time someone says an abrupt goodbye to you, use this experience to move on out of that negative roadway and onto the next amazing path life has in store for you. Breakups can be a good thing and cause you to look deeper into who you are and what is really important to you long term. Cry a little, wave them goodbye and get ready for a better place without them in it.

Susan McCord @

Having Trouble With Your Lovelife? Maybe Your Dating Checklist Needs Revising

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Many men & women who have written my advice column  are complaining about the obvious checklists people have when they are out on a date.  They feel that it is much more like an interview than a casual encounter!  This is a huge turnoff  and comes across clinical.  Men say  that women have a longer list which is much more specific than a man’s but still don’t know what they really want at the end of the day.

Women feel that a man’s checklist resembles something like this:

Must like sex 7 days a week.
Have a nice body.
Must like watching Sports and be OK with his regular boys night out!
Be willing to try new things regardless of what it is.
She must be a good cook & love being in the kitchen.

Why Do Women Seem to Have More On Their Dating Checklists?

Women tend to be less trusting than men on the first few dates and want to know everything they can about a possible life partner; they want to cover all their options.  Unfortunately some women don’t realize how this comes across and the men feel like they are on trial with this obvious checklist put in front of them.  While it is important to ask questions and open the communication lines; both sexes need to slow down & enjoy the moment, not interrogate each other.  There are many guys now that also have these checklists and it makes the first few dates very awkward.  First impressions are everything so why would you want someone to think you are bringing out your rule book questionnaire and checking off the boxes with each tedious question?

Online dating now has this quick elimination process with both sexes almost looking for flaws & sabotaging any first meeting at all.  People are quick to read the dating profiles with a harsh judgment and if one thing isn’t exactly what they are looking for they are onto the next person.  This is one of the reasons so many people are lonely today! They don’t give anyone a chance and if they do make it to the first date it is often quickly decided that their date doesn’t meet all the checklist requirements!  Who have we become? Are we looking for a clone of ourselves? How boring would that be!

One of my YouTube subscribers feels that everyone should go on a minimum of two dates with each person.  He feels that if you have a great verbal connection, there is something worth exploring.  He gets really frustrated with the checklist that many women seem to have.  Are we being too picky due to the fact that there is always another person waiting on our dating site and so we always think we can do better with the next one?

It is said that there are no coincidences & that each person we come in contact with is there for a purpose. If that is the case, why don’t we acknowledge each encounter as a life lesson?  Regardless of how small the message may be, there will always be something to learn from it.  People are so quick to judge & make assumptions without giving others a second look.  Someone could be dealing with some personal issues that happened that day or had some bad news before the date and may not be themselves.  They could be new at dating & shy with the whole process. Everyone has something to offer and there is someone for everyone. We need to slow down & pay attention to a persons attributes and not spending our time looking for their flaws.

What Should Our Checklist Priorities Look Like?

Character ~ Kind, loving, thoughtful, loyal.
Compatibility ~ common interests, enjoy the same sports, want to travel or happy to stay home.
Attraction ~ mental, physical & sexual (Notice how I put mental attraction first.)
Communication ~ can you talk openly to each other? Are you emotionally connected?
Personality ~ Do they make you laugh, make you a priority, make you think, add to your life?
Career ~ you mutually respect & encourage each others choices.
Parenting ~ both be equally on board with either wanting children, stepchildren or not having children.
Religious beliefs ~ this is a big problem in some relationships.
Location & Living Arrangements ~ Is it important where you live? Close to Family or loved ones?

Of course this list is generalized and each person should categorize their checklist to what works best for them. Children or Religion may be higher on your list.  Prioritizing money or looks on the first line may get you the odd date but ultimately is a shallow approach to long term happiness. Be realistic when preparing your checklist, whether it is mentally accumulated or in written form.  Look in the mirror and really see yourself for who you are & how you want others to see you as well.  No one is perfect & we have to start giving others a chance without negative judgment.  As I said earlier, there is a reason they are in your life, no matter how brief the moment, embrace it.

Susan McCord @

Believe! Using The Law Of Attraction to Find Love & Better Your Relationships

I am sure by now you have heard this term a few times and may even be getting fed up with how much exposure it is receiving and what does it mean anyway?

In simpler terms: law of attraction means: like attracts like.

Behavior breeds behavior, so when you appear optimistic you will attract others of the same towards you or if you are pessimistic you will keep bringing negative people into your circle. The Law of Attraction helps you learn how to receive & believe you can change your life to attract what you want.  It doesn’t just have to be a dream!

For example: If you are really unhappy in your current job  it may be time to seriously consider leaving it. Your quality of life is more important than staying somewhere that you have outgrown and you are only there because it is easy and safe. Pursuing your life passion should become your focus so that you don’t waste anymore time doing something that is making you very unhappy.  Think about it; If you are constantly putting yourself in a negative environment, how can you possibly be sending out good thoughts?  You just get more of the same repetitive negativity coming back on a daily basis. Putting yourself in a happy place demolishes the demons that keep harboring your regular thoughts.  Just try to be miserable when you are happy!

Don’t look at it as a dream; actually visualize your new path. It is easier to achieve something when you can see it clearly.

Most people are fearful of change especially in their later years. Fear is the biggest obstacle in the average person’s achievements.  Inviting change keeps a person young and removes complacency.

Many individuals do not know how to be alone. They are not comfortable in their own skin. They go from one relationship to the next without any time between the two. In fact many people already have a new relationship lined up before they end the first one. How can you possibly find a new partner when you are still emotionally connected with someone else? Of course it is scary with the thought of being alone again but it is still better to take your time after a breakup than to pull someone into your broken heart.

Pursuing your passion is always the right path. Listen to your intuition, it is never wrong.

If you keep attracting the wrong people into your life, it is happening because of the images you are seeing in your mind. Ask yourself honestly what type of relationship you truly want. Are you looking for love or friendship? How well do you communicate? What does your body language say to others? What do you think of yourself?

By changing your thoughts you can change your life.

Contrary to what many people think attraction may mean, it is not necessarily always a good thing.  Being “attracted or having something or someone attracted to you” can be also be a negative if not used correctly. It is what your thoughts project that comes back into your life.  The energy or vibration that you put out is exactly what the Universe gives back. If you keep meeting abusive people, you are sending out something that is allowing this pattern to happen.  Do not ignore these signs as it may be time to talk to a therapist about this reoccurring scenario. On the other side of the coin, learning how to use this “attraction technique” to bring loving people into your life is what this discussion is all about! The more you practice it, more of the same great things will appear on your path.

Don’t believe me? Look back at your relationships over the years; is there a pattern?  When you say negative comments like:”I never meet anyone”, or “everyone is taken”, “who would want me”, that is what you are projecting! Try saying;  I am going to meet a wonderful partner and believe I deserve a great relationshipThat is what you will achieve if you say it with conviction. Letting those negative thoughts creep in continually will slow the process down immensely.

Send out powerful thoughts on what you really want to receive. Try it for a month and be aware of the positive changes that occur in your life.  (I met my husband using this method!)  There are many articles on this subject and some have been over publicized, but there are some great messages that should not be ignored.

Make a list of what you want and what you are grateful for in your life. Read it back on a regular basis and say it out loud.

People that believe they can have it all are successful because they believed. For all of you non believers, it might be time to open yourself up to trying a new approach to life.  It can’t hurt and who knows, you may actually become a better person and enjoy your own company which will project onto others.  New doors will open and life will only get better.

Susan McCord  &