Hi there! Welcome to Dear Sybersue. Today, I discuss the topic: Should I Be Honest On The 1st Date If I’m Not Interested in Them?
The reason there is so much ghosting going on today in dating and within new relationships is that people are not being truthful about how they are really feeling about someone early on. If you don’t feel a connection with the person you are on a date with, it is always better to gently tell them you don’t feel a spark rather than to lead them on, letting them think that you will see them again.
Human kindness can go a long way when you take the time to be considerate to others 💓
We all deserve to know the truth about how someone feels about us, but we need to be mature about how we deliver or receive the message. If you are not feeling a connection, telling someone the soft truth helps give them closure to move on and find love with someone else. That way, they are not sitting around waiting for you to contact them.
A few of my clients have shared how disappointing it is when things are left up in the air after the first or second date. Their date told them they would definitely call again, but they didn’t come through on their promise. Disappearing without a word can be very hurtful for most people, and it can really play on someone’s self-esteem when it is happening on a regular basis.
It is perfectly normal that you’re not going to click romantically with everyone, and it is much more respectful to tell them you didn’t feel a connection than to walk away and not say anything at all. As much as that may feel awkward to hear this at first, it is important to understand that you are not always going to have mutual chemistry with someone. That is OK. You don’t feel a connection with everyone, either, so remember that when you are feeling rejected during these honest moments.
Another reason to be open and communicative with your date is that some people think things were going really well, only to find out you were not on the same page with them at all. The big problem here is they don’t find this out until much later when you don’t contact them for a second date. It’s not very kind to just shut the door on someone without giving them some congenial and respectful feedback. It’s a much nicer approach to be open with them, for sure.
So many people are left feeling so alone when this ghosting scenario keeps happening to them over and over again.
Being ghosted by someone is heartbreaking, and it is happening way too often. It really is so imperative to “treat others how you want to be treated.” When you practice this on a daily basis in all aspects of your life, you will naturally attract more great experiences towards you. Behavior breeds behavior, which means what you put out, you will often get back in return.
When you get stuck in a place of feeling hopeless about ever finding that special partner, it becomes a vicious cycle of repetitive thoughts. It is such a difficult mindset to get out of because of the loneliness you may be feeling. This is the time to stop dating and take a break from it all.
You need to step back and recharge yourself from dates gone bad and feeling disrespected by those people who have just walked away. You don’t see it now, but taking a sabbatical from the dating scene can give you so much more clarity than staying in a space that isn’t serving you well. This is why we take vacations from our jobs, it clears the cobwebs and gives us a new outlook when we change up our environment every so often.
Dating is an excellent learning space and can teach you a lot about yourself, and the people you choose to date
Watch for patterns if your dates are continually not working out for you. Shutting down and becoming defensive will only bring you more distance from finding your special person. Be open and ask questions if you are confused about why your date felt there wasn’t a connection with you.
Are you always attracted to a similar type of person to date? Are they luring you back into the one-date repetition mode? Many men and women do not realize they have got themselves into this place and continue to be frustrated, saying that there is no one out there for them. If you find that you are starting to lump all men and all women into one category, then I can pretty much guarantee that you are choosing the same type of people who aren’t good for you.
The more receptive and honest you are with people that you engage with, the more you will learn. This will bring you much closer to meeting a potential partner because you know what you are looking for and how to implement new behaviors into your dating life. We don’t always know how we come across to others, and it is never too late to learn new things about ourselves.
*Thank you so much for visiting here today! Please click on the video above to hear more about today’s topic, and please leave a comment below. I love to hear from you!
Sybersue xo <3
Private Dating Relationship Coaching With Sybersue – Please get in touch with me @ https://www.calltheone.com/susan-mccord and message me there to set up a video call or voice call appointment within 24 hours. Thank you!