Breakups Can Change You in a Positive Way!
There is always a big reason why a breakup happens. The Universe really is on your side and wants the best for you but sometimes we need a big push to understand this.
Quite often we just don’t see that we were unhappy in our partnership and when it ends, it is our ego that takes the initial beating.
Every relationship has a purpose and teaches you something in your life. Once you learn those lessons it is a smoother transition to the path that you are meant to be on. (Quite often we hang on to the wrong partners because we are afraid to be alone.) If you continue to settle in the wrong relationships you will be shortchanging yourself from the powerful love you are meant to have.
Even if it is for our highest good how do we get through the first few months of heartbreak?
- Allow yourself to grieve. It’s OK to cocoon at home and shut out the world for a bit. In fact, it is healthy to do so. Your Ex was a bit part of your life and you shared a love together!
- Own your part in why your partnership ended. There are always two sides to a breakup.
- Be careful not to numb your sadness by self-medicating with too much alcohol, binge eating, or drug use. It is cleansing to cry, so try not to subdue those feelings of despair.
- Exercise as much as possible which will help release those natural endorphins. Looking good is also a great revenge tactic! 😉
- Take your Ex off your social media sites and avoid having any contact until you can revisit (maybe) having a friendship down the road one day. You do not need to see what they are doing in their life right now as it only prolongs the pain you are feeling every day.
- You don’t have to pretend to be strong. If you are having a really difficult time moving on, it is a great idea to talk to a professional about it. Our friends and family don’t always know how to help us.
- Get outside whenever you can, even if it is just to sit on a bench at the park! Nature is an amazing emotional healer.
- Try to shut your mind off of thinking about your breakup by watching something educational, a funny show, or participate in a yoga class on YouTube. One hour per day will give your sadness a reprieve.
- Do not get back on the horse right away! Dating while your heart is broken will only prolong your pain and it can make you miss them even more! Give yourself at least 6 months before you even contemplate dating someone else. It really isn’t fair to see them while you are still healing. You are not ready for anything yet.
How do you see this breakup as a positive thing?
Every relationship you have in your life has something to teach you and the faster you understand what that is, the faster you will find your true happiness.
We often tend to repeat some hurtful patterns because we don’t learn the lesson we were meant to at the time.
For example: some of my female clients continually attract bad boys into their lives because that is what they think they like! They tell me that they need to have that crazy excitement and they have to be very sexually attracted to a guy. These ladies are addicted to the drama of the hot and cold emotional game of “when will they call me again.”
The bad boy has all the control in this type of relationship. Why would you want that?
When you comprehend that a partnership doesn’t have to be filled with ups and downs is when you graduate to the understanding that your confidence and self-respect are #1. Yes, I know that it always takes some work to keep a relationship fresh and in a healthy place, but it shouldn’t be continually annoying, destroying, or emotionally tense!
When you replay the pros and cons of your breakup it will help you visualize what worked and didn’t work between you as a couple.
Ideally, it would be wonderful if we could look at all of our breakups objectively and start to implement this into our thought process. It would bring us to the healing stage a lot faster. It will also help us to attract a better partner towards us in the future because we know what doesn’t work and we know what does work.
I know that it isn’t easy to deal with a breakup but you came to this post looking for a little positivity, which I hope you will eventually start to feel by using these tools. Hang in there because you will soon be able to reflect and understand, that your breakup was a stepping stone to an even better place of where you are meant to be.
Think back to some of your past relationships; would you want to be in any of them today? Probably not. You deserve to meet a great partner to share your future with. Be grateful for all those life lessons you have learned over the years and forgive yourself for some of those choices you made.
It’s OK to endure some tough love decisions while you find your way in life but don’t punish yourself by continually repeating these scenarios. Learn from them, own them, and move on from them with a big smile. It only gets better from here.
Please watch the video above!
Thanks for visiting Sybersue xo <3
Personal Dating or Relationship Questions for Sybersue? Contact me via https://www.calltheone.com/susan-mccord and text me to set up a video call appt. within 24 hours.