Love and all that Jazz – Susan McCord
NAME: Susan McCord aka Dear SyberSue
GENERATION: Baby Boomer
OCCUPATION (S): Dating /Relationship Coach, Talk Show Host, Published Author, Advice Columnist/Blogger. I also write for many other online platforms such as vocal.media and Mogul. I host a monthly support group for women who are dealing with divorce, self-esteem issues, getting over a long-term relationship, single mothers and getting back out into the dating market again!
LOCATION: Vancouver, BC
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN YOUR LATTE? Skim milk with cinnamon
HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOUR STYLE:
In the fall & winter months I am a jeans/leggings, boots and sweater girl. I collect coats of all shapes and colors! I probably need an intervention! I seem to have a lot of black and white outfits but I am really drawn to anything red or silver grey!
In the spring/summer months, I love to wear off the shoulder feminine blouses with capris or skirts and classy jumpsuits or gowns are my “go to” staple for events or evenings out. I am very social!
I am also a little bit Boho and have a closet full of flowy tops and long sleeveless dresses. I love chunky jewelry, big earrings and anything blingy which includes my phone case! I am not a follower and beat to my own fashion drum. 😉
THREE THINGS YOU CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT?
- Some form of fitness such as hot yoga, spinning, hiking and weight training! I call this my cheap therapy because it keeps my mind clear for writing, gets me off the computer, keeps my weight somewhat in check and improves my health physically and emotionally. It clears the cobwebs so to speak!
- I can’t live without Love! My son and my husband are the loves of my life! I also love animals of all kinds and talk to every dog on the street! I’m actually not kidding.
- My colorist! I will be 95 years old and will always make time to go to the salon. What grey hair, it’s natural!
WHO/WHAT ARE YOUR INSPIRATIONS IN LIFE?
I like that you offered the choice of what and not just who in this question. I didn’t really have a mentor growing up but I learned how to be a strong woman due to being given the role of big sister nurturer & housekeeper at home (5 kids) which basically took over my youth. I moved out at 17 and worked full time at a computer job and part-time at The Keg restaurant to support my rent and shoe fetish!
I guess you could say that Travel was my big inspiration in life.
Ever since I was 13 years old I had decided I wanted to be a flight attendant and made my dream happen at age 21. Flying around the world for 25 years is an education that you just can’t get from a book or classroom setting! You never stop learning! This also helped me understand men and women of all cultures & status in numerous countries. The one thing we all have in common is the need for love.
If I had to choose someone who was an inspiration I would say Betty White and Oprah (yes I know, cliché choice right?) Betty, because she lives life to the fullest, is funnier than anyone I know and hasn’t slowed down at the tender age of 96! Oprah; has she survived a lot of diversity & abuse and has taught so many people how to also overcome these traumatizing obstacles. She’s done a lot for others and gives so many people hope.
I also love George Clooney but that’s just because he’s hot and he’s my hall pass. (Wink wink)
WHEN DID YOU BECOME A DATING/RELATIONSHIP COACH AND WHY?
I have been asked for advice since I was a teenager! Maybe it was due to the mature role & responsibilities I had at home, or maybe I am a bit of an old soul who has been here way too many times?? Ha!
Connecting with others has always been easy for me as I am not a shy woman. I love to talk to people and I love to listen as well. Everyone has a story to share! I started a podcast back in 2004, (yes, way before there were podcasts!) and then eventually started My YouTube show in 2009!
By the time I was 28 I was married, divorced and a single mom of an 18-month-old boy. I had lots to deal with and the learning curve was a very long winding road! I had a lot to share with others going through a similar ordeal.
I have been writing since I was 10 years old so it was a natural progression to write my advice column, my book, and my dating/relationship blog. I have always taken courses over the years and became a certified coach 4 years ago. I enjoy helping people and I have done a lot of pro bono work over the years, but I needed to be able to pay my bills too!
WHAT QUESTIONS DO MOST OF YOUR YOUTUBE VIEWERS & CLIENTS ASK?
I get more questions from men than I do from women which initially surprised me. I guess it is easier for them to ask these private things when there is a computer in front of them and not a real person. It is difficult for some men to open up emotionally and that is the first thing they usually tell me. Here are some popular questions I have received from both men and women:
- Why are women so high maintenance? They seem to only be interested in my wallet! How do I meet a quality woman who is into me and not into what kind of car I drive or what I do for a living?
- Why has my boyfriend not asked me to marry him after 4 years? Why can’t he commit to me? How much longer do I wait for him? Do I give him an ultimatum?
- How can I learn how to talk to women and approach them with confidence? What’s wrong with me and why am I so afraid of rejection?
- Why do men only seem interested in one thing? SEX! Why don’t they call or text me after I have sex with them on the first few dates?
- How do I get past being cheated on? Will I ever be able to trust anyone?
- Why can’t I move on after my divorce or long-term relationship breakup? Will I ever find love again? How do I even begin to start dating again?
- I have been texting with this guy for months, why haven’t we met in person yet? Should I hang around?
- The girl I was seeing just vanished without any communication and won’t answer my texts. What do I do?
WHAT’S YOUR MAIN ADVICE IN MAINTAINING A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR SPOUSE/PARTNER?
- Always talk to your partner and do not shut them out! It’s called a partnership for a reason because you are supposed to share things with them. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable once in a while.
- Always make an effort to look good for yourself and your partner. There is no room for complacency in a relationship. You were attracted to each other for a reason; always remember to keep that attraction alive. It only takes a few minutes every day and will add miles to your relationship!
- Couples who play together stay together. Do fun things with them and change it up often! Grow together not apart.
- Always have your partners back!
- Have regular date nights and yes, sex is important! It’s not just for birthdays or special occasions! Keep those fires burning so they come back to your bed and not someone else’s!
- The little things count! Love notes, sweet texts throughout the day, compliments, undivided attention when they are talking to you or sharing a glass of wine in candlelight.
Susan McCord aka Dear Sybersue
Check out this post and more with Stylist Eleni @ The Style Latte
Dating/Relationship/Lifestyle Talk Show Host, Published Author, Interviewer, Certified Life Coach, Blogger & Advice Columnist.