Are You Too Judgmental about People When Out Dating?

Are You Too Judgmental about People When Out Dating?

Dear Sybersue’s weekly video upload is a discussion on people who are being too judgmental, especially when out on a date!

Both men and women are quick to complain about how hard it is to date in the millennium but continue to make harsh judgment calls very early on when meeting someone new.

We all have special traits, every last one of us!

Are we trying to sabotage our own happiness because we don’t actually believe that we are worthy of having a great partnership? Is this where our high maintenance judgment comes from; out of fear?

If I blow them off first, they won’t have a chance to reject me?”

As Doctor Phil says: How is that working for you????

Or…

Is is because we are fed up with what’s not working for us right away and that we have become jaded and lazy? Are our expectations out of control?

Why don’t we put the same respect and energy into our relationships that we do for our careers?  As I have said many in many past articles; meeting a life partner is like a full time job!  It takes work and perseverance.

But isn’t it worth it?

I talked to so many men and women on my advice column this past year that just don’t have the patience to date. They give themselves a 2 month window when they go online (or use dating apps) and then when they don’t meet someone right away, they give up!

There’s no one out there, I can’t be bothered wasting my time on this.”

If it’s too easy, too quickly, it usually fizzles just as fast anyway! How long does it take to go to University and get a degree? Many of us seem to have the patience for that! Love and careers are both important in everyone’s life but we often tend to forget that, which makes our priorities out of wack!

They both need your attention!

Who are we becoming and where do we get off looking at someone on Tinder for 20 secs and swipe left because “yech they are sooooooo not our type!” When did we get so shallow?

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If something isn’t working for you it is time to really look at why it isn’t. You are the one in charge of your life decisions so it is YOU that has the authority to make changes that will enhance your love-life.

How Do I Do That?

  1. Start saying positive things about people every day.
  2. The minute you hear pessimism in your voice; stop and alter the direction of your thinking. It won’t be easy at first because you will have to deprogram your mindset to a different frequency.
  3. You want people to give you a chance and you don’t want them to judge you harshly when they first meet you right? Remember this, the next time you engage in a conversation with someone and see how quickly things become optimistic in your life.
  4. Good energy attracts like minded energy! It is so much better being around happy people which is contagious. It can only get better from there.
  5. Remove yourself from judgmental people. “Misery loves company!” The more you put yourself into negative situations the more you will keep attracting them into your life.
  6. Take time out every day to be grateful for something in your world. Say it out loud as you are getting ready for work or going out for the evening. The more gracious you are about your life, the less time you will have to dwell on what doesn’t make you happy.
  7. Hire a Dating/Relationship Coach for a few sessions. They can help you with your self-esteem and what you may not be seeing within yourself. Usually when we are too critical about others it is really because we are also critical of ourselves.

What do you think? Have you been in this judgmental place and how did you handle it?  Please leave your comments below this post, I would love to hear what you have to say! ❤

Questions for Sybersue? Download the free app and text her 24/7 at http://www.instantgo.com/dearsybersue

Susan McCord aka Dear Sybersue

Dear Sybersue YouTube        Dear Sybersue Facebook  

Is It Time for a Dating Attitude Makeover?

Is It Time for a Dating Attitude Makeover?

Are you really sick and tired of dating right now? Are things constantly not working out for you and pissing you off big time?

Are you in the mind frame of giving up on dating because there isn’t anyone out there that interests you? Do you have a hard time getting past the first date or even meeting someone to date?

I am sorry to have to say this but it is definitely time for you to have a “dating attitude” makeover!

There is something that you are doing that is not allowing you to have a loving partnership and it is time to get to the root of the problem. Negativity attracts more negativity so if you are constantly complaining about what isn’t working for you all the time, you will not attract what you really want.

Whether you believe that statement or not, it is the truth and is proven over and over again in all aspects of life.

It’s time to look on the bright side and remove those repetitive dark images that you have allowed to crowd your everyday thinking.

Even if you aren’t saying these things “out loud” you are thinking them on a regular basis. When you keep going back to those deflated thoughts, “There is no one out there for me,” “Dating sucks!” you will begin to truly believe and convince yourself of the truth in this statement.

This also goes for all of you who have given up on finding love and are cocooning at home saying, “What is the point?” You are still surrounding yourself in a defeatist attitude even if you aren’t talking openly about it to anyone.

But for those of you who are getting out of the house and making an effort to meet someone be careful not to surround yourself with people who also have a negative vision of dating. If your friends are becoming a “misery loves company” scenario, you need to change that up fast. Hang out with happy people, it’s contagious!

There is someone for everyone, so stop sabotaging your own happiness because of things that haven’t worked out for you in the love department. You are in charge! Fix it!

If you go out for the evening with a pleasant attitude and you are fun to be around, you will shine a light that people will be naturally attracted towards. This is not spiritual hoopla it is a fact.

You are lovable and desirable as is everyone on this beautiful planet we live on. When your heart and mind are ready to receive that special person into your life, it will happen. You just have to deprogram those negative inner voice demons that keep haunting you.

Being aware of what’s not working and that something needs to change within yourself, is half of the battle.

Attitude is everything and will make or break all your walks of life. Please watch the video above to see how you can improve what may not be working right now and learn how you can start to improve it tomorrow.

Susan McCord

The Dear Sybersue Talk Show YouTube

Dear Sybersue Facebook