Are You Too Judgmental about People When Out Dating?

Are You Too Judgmental about People When Out Dating?

Dear Sybersue’s weekly video upload is a discussion on people who are being too judgmental, especially when out on a date!

Both men and women are quick to complain about how hard it is to date in the millennium but continue to make harsh judgment calls very early on when meeting someone new.

We all have special traits, every last one of us!

Are we trying to sabotage our own happiness because we don’t actually believe that we are worthy of having a great partnership? Is this where our high maintenance judgment comes from; out of fear?

If I blow them off first, they won’t have a chance to reject me?”

As Doctor Phil says: How is that working for you????

Or…

Is is because we are fed up with what’s not working for us right away and that we have become jaded and lazy? Are our expectations out of control?

Why don’t we put the same respect and energy into our relationships that we do for our careers?  As I have said many in many past articles; meeting a life partner is like a full time job!  It takes work and perseverance.

But isn’t it worth it?

I talked to so many men and women on my advice column this past year that just don’t have the patience to date. They give themselves a 2 month window when they go online (or use dating apps) and then when they don’t meet someone right away, they give up!

There’s no one out there, I can’t be bothered wasting my time on this.”

If it’s too easy, too quickly, it usually fizzles just as fast anyway! How long does it take to go to University and get a degree? Many of us seem to have the patience for that! Love and careers are both important in everyone’s life but we often tend to forget that, which makes our priorities out of wack!

They both need your attention!

Who are we becoming and where do we get off looking at someone on Tinder for 20 secs and swipe left because “yech they are sooooooo not our type!” When did we get so shallow?

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If something isn’t working for you it is time to really look at why it isn’t. You are the one in charge of your life decisions so it is YOU that has the authority to make changes that will enhance your love-life.

How Do I Do That?

  1. Start saying positive things about people every day.
  2. The minute you hear pessimism in your voice; stop and alter the direction of your thinking. It won’t be easy at first because you will have to deprogram your mindset to a different frequency.
  3. You want people to give you a chance and you don’t want them to judge you harshly when they first meet you right? Remember this, the next time you engage in a conversation with someone and see how quickly things become optimistic in your life.
  4. Good energy attracts like minded energy! It is so much better being around happy people which is contagious. It can only get better from there.
  5. Remove yourself from judgmental people. “Misery loves company!” The more you put yourself into negative situations the more you will keep attracting them into your life.
  6. Take time out every day to be grateful for something in your world. Say it out loud as you are getting ready for work or going out for the evening. The more gracious you are about your life, the less time you will have to dwell on what doesn’t make you happy.
  7. Hire a Dating/Relationship Coach for a few sessions. They can help you with your self-esteem and what you may not be seeing within yourself. Usually when we are too critical about others it is really because we are also critical of ourselves.

What do you think? Have you been in this judgmental place and how did you handle it?  Please leave your comments below this post, I would love to hear what you have to say! ❤

Questions for Sybersue? Download the free app and text her 24/7 at http://www.instantgo.com/dearsybersue

Susan McCord aka Dear Sybersue

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I am Single but all my Friends are in Relationships! (I have no one to go out with.)

I am Single but all my Friends are in Relationships! (I have no one to go out with.)

Dear Sybersue,

I am so happy to have found you on YouTube and your videos answer many of my questions about dating & relationships! Although, I haven’t seen one that can help me with my question.  That is the reason I am here on your advice column/blog asking for advice. (I hope you will film one regarding this issue for other people as well.)

Here is my question:

I am a 38 year old woman who wants to meet someone special to have a committed partnership with but I have no single friends to go out with.

All of my friends are in relationships and I am tired of being the 3rd wheel! It makes me feel like I am a burden to them and that they feel obligated to let me tag along. (Or they feel sorry for me which is even worse!) I appreciate their support but I think it is wearing thin on them. I try not to complain but sometimes I just can’t help it.

How do I get up the courage to go out alone? How can I meet new people?

Continue reading

Don’t Fake who you are to be in a Relationship!

Talk Show Host Susan McCord & Guest Co-Host Andrea Wesley talk about a subject in this video that seems to affect so many people today.

Are you faking who you are just to be in a new relationship? Are you frustrated out there in the dating market and fed up with things not working out in your love-life?

Dating today is as annoying as Hell and some men and women have all but given up on the whole concept of finding a lasting partnership. The big problem with this is; people are not being authentic to who they truly are, because it doesn’t seem to work!

Let the games begin!

Both sexes start acting the way they think someone would be attracted to them; therefore losing themselves in the process.

How long can you play the role of someone you’re not?

Learn to stay true to yourself to attract someone else who is also true to them self. It can be a long road trying to meet that person you have a genuine and reciprocated desire to be with; but in the end it is better to be in a REAL relationship than being in one that is made up of a phoney pretense.

You are a great person just the way you are and don’t change anything just to please someone else. Take your time and don’t give up on love because it is there and available for you when you are ready to accept and be the true version of yourself.

Susan McCord @ The Dear Sybersue Talk Show
Andrea Wesley @ The Bolde