Single? Ladies Don’t be Sad on Valentine’s Day

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Dear Sybersue,

Oh God, it’s that dreadful time of year again where I feel even lonelier than every other day of the year being single. February 14th and all the romantic hype is a reminder of how alone I really am!  It is a very depressing day for me.

I am a 28 year old fairly attractive outgoing woman living in Toronto and in desperate need of some advice on how to get through the “wrath of cupid” every year on this day!

Help!

Single Samantha

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤  ❤

Dear Samantha,

I have this conversation with women all the time and I am sure single guys probably feel the void as well but just don’t vocalize it.

The one thing I always did when I was single on Valentines’ Day was to go out & socialize! “Screw Cupid, he can shove the arrow right up his a#s!” I usually went to a lounge or Pub that had less of a romantic setting with pool tables, dart boards & other manly attractions.

It was interesting to see how many other people showed up as well! You are pretty much guaranteed that everyone who is not with a partner in the room on Valentine’s Day…is single! That can be a great time to meet someone!

Going out for a coffee or a movie with a girlfriend is also a great way to not give into the BS of February 14th only being a date night! Don’t be afraid to be seen without a man on your arm. Go out and show your confidence on this annoying relationship celebration! You are proud to be single and not settling with someone just to be in a couple’s scenario. You are waiting for real love! ❤  

Hibernating and feeling sad at home means you are giving into this holiday stereotype and letting Hallmark & other marketing scams work their financial rewards. Be a rebel and stand tall!

You are a fantastic person whether you are single or not. Do not ever let a relationship define who you are!

Being single has many benefits that a lot of married people will occasionally yearn for!

Here are 12 things to think about that will help you deal with Feb 14th

  1. You can do whatever you want whenever you want & be spontaneous!
  2. Girl’s night out can happen often and without having to plan it 2-3 weeks in advance or without having to get permission from a partner.
  3. It doesn’t matter what goes on in Vegas ~ you can be as bad as you want!
  4. You can order “take out” every night and never use your oven!
  5. You don’t have to shave your legs or get a Brazilian & you can wear your comfortable “big girl panties” without being judged!
  6. You can watch, The Bachelor, The Young & Restless, The Breakup or any chick flick you want! You are in charge of the remote!
  7. You don’t have to watch Dick Flicks!
  8. You can put a 6 pack of beer in the fridge on Friday and there will be 4 bottles left on Monday!
  9. You have complete control of the house temperature & the bed covers!
  10. Your toilet seat will always remain in the downward position.
  11. Your newspaper/magazines will never end up in the bathroom & remain on the coffee table completely intact.
  12. The only snoring or farting you hear will be your own. 🙂

 Now get off the couch Samantha, be proud you are single & go out for a fun Valentine’s Day!

❤ Hugs & hearts, Sybersue ❤

Dating Advice For Women ~ Men Want to Know why Some Women are so Aggressive After the 1st Date!

Dear Sybersue is a Dating/Relationship/Lifestyle Advice Talk Show for Men & Women of all Ages! Canadian Talk Show Host Susan McCord discusses a question she has received from quite a few guys recently. They want to know why some women are so aggressive after the 1st date. They don’t wait for the guys to call or text and start contacting the men on a regular basis before the second date is even made. Why are some women so impatient? The men find this very unattractive and tell Sybersue how much it “turns them off!”

What do you think? Please leave your comments below the video.

Susan McCord’s YouTube Channel  @ http://www.youtube.com /twobeavers
Facebook Page @ http://www.facebook.com/DatingRelationshipTalkShow

Relationship Advice for Men & Women ~ The Living Together Checklist: Is it Time to Move In Together?

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We are very compatible but should we move in together?

Do couples really take enough time going over the “Living Together Checklist” before they decide to move in together? This list is a necessary tool to use when making such a committed decision.

Important questions to ask yourself:

  • How long have you known each other & do you really “know” them?
  • Why have you decided to live together?
  • How are your finances?
  • Is living together a matter of convenience or do you truly love your partner?
  • Are you moving in due to long distance relationship issues?
  • Do you know and love their quirks?
  • Are you settling due to your advancing age or fear of being alone?
  • Are you ready? (Believe it or not that is the biggest question of all!)
  • Where will you live together?  (You both have to be happy with this decision and it is always better if it is a neutral home you have chosen together and not one that either of you live in at the time ~ for obvious reasons.)

What should you be looking for in a reciprocated partnership and are you both looking for the same things down the road?

Have you discussed what your future roommate will be bringing into your shared home?  Do they have children?  Do they have big responsibilities due to pets or a dependent mother or father?  Home decorating can be a difficult compromise. She may be partial to pink ruffled pillows & lace curtains and want to renovate the den into a shoe closet, while he wants to hang his photo of “The Godfather” over the living room fireplace, prefers burlap beanbag chairs and wants to install full length ceiling mirrors & a swing in the bedroom.  (What’s wrong with that?  Come on ladies you really should be more flexible!)

What city do you want to reside in and are you OK if you or your partner might have to relocate due to a career situation?  Will this be a problem?  How do you get along with their family and if they don’t live in your vicinity will they be staying with you while visiting?  (Remember the movies Monster in Law & Meet the Fockers!)

Do you both want children?  How many and when would you like to start a family?  Is marriage a priority for either of you?  It is important to know that you are both on the same page with this and be really up front with your answer.  No sugar coating the answers if you are not into it or not going to be ready for 5 years.  Be fair to your partner and don’t just say what you think they want to hear.  There are many stories out there with this being a big problem ending in breakups and resentment.

Here is an important thing to discuss; what are the sexual expectations of your relationship?

Things can change drastically when you see each other every day.  It’s no longer quite as exciting as the early chase of a new love. You both have to work a little harder to keep the sex and intimacy exciting!  It really helps to keep things fresh when don’t see each other every evening.  Make plans once a week with friends so that your partner has time to miss you. Couples are happier when they don’t feel restrained in a relationship.  Talk about sex before you move in together, not after.  Discuss it outside the bedroom so there is no pressure in the heat of the moment.  Be really honest about what is important to you to ensure you are both comfortable about your desires and expectations in the love making department.  I shouldn’t have to say this but make sure you are sexually attracted to them and not just acting out the part because you want a committed partnership.  Sex and money are the two biggest reasons for the demise of a relationship!

You should not have to give up your hobbies or fitness regimens.  Having the occasional separate outing is healthy.  It gives you something different to talk about with your partner.  Cohabitating can be a lot of fun when you respect each other’s boundaries and appreciate the differences you both bring into the relationship.  Compromise is the key to longevity with most couples and so is a great sex life.  You’re not single anymore so don’t live that way in your partnership. There are two of you now.  Planning week long adventures on a monthly basis, golfing all weekend or making last minute plans without them will eventually lead to hurt and resentment.  The romance is not over the minute you sign a lease or the mortgage papers, it is even more important now than ever if you want to live in a happy environment.  So many people forget that simple part to help keep the love alive.  Small gestures go a long way in preserving love & happiness long term.

Many relationships break-up when the little aggravations are not addressed, also known as “irreconcilable differences!”

Some people really do sweat the small stuff in a partnership and can be quite high maintenance with their daily regimen. For starters, it is always a good idea to have two bathrooms in your communal pad due to obvious reasons.  Men have six bathroom items on their counter and they use I roll of toilet paper a month.  Women have 500 toiletry items and go through a 10 pack roll of 4 ply in a week!  (OK maybe that’s just at my house!)  Other things like towels on the floor, hair in the tub, remnants in the toilet, toothpaste on the mirror and lingerie hanging from the shower rod can eventually end a relationship due to constant bickering or lack of respect for each other’s space!

It’s not a bad idea to do a trial living arrangement  first.  This will tell you many things about each other.  Is someone more territorial in this new environment?  Are they easy going or controlling?  Discussing the living together checklist”  before you actually commit to it can be a really good training ground.  Communicating and paying attention to even the smallest details could save you many arguments and heartbreak as you work through them together.  It is easy to be attracted to someone and even love them, but it is not always easy to share your living environment with another person.  Even if the sex is unbelievable, it is not usually enough to sustain a partnership especially as the years wear on ~ you need to really like each other as well!  Coming home to someone you love everyday is a wonderful feeling and worth every moment of taking time to get to know them beforehand.

Susan McCord @ http://www.youtube.com/twobeavers

Dating Relationship ~ 10 Things Men Wish Women Wouldn’t Do & 10 Things Women Wish Men Wouldn’t Do!

#TBT It’s Throw Back Thursday and time to revisit a few videos from a few years ago! We had a lot of fun with these two shows:)

This topic discusses little pet peeves that many men & women have dealt with in their dating & relationship experiences. It’s not a bad thing and we each have our own quirks and idiosyncrasies. That’s life!  When we learn to accept and appreciate the little things that make each sex different is when we stop ending relationships for the smallest reasons!

Many people sabotage their own happiness because their checklists are too long and unrealistic.  We all have to lighten up and quit sweating the small crap that happens in life. I know that is easier said than done and I have to remind myself not let certain things get to me as well.  It’s so easy to get frustrated when things don’t go our way more often than we would like, and that includes scenarios in a partnership.

Learning to laugh about our distinctive habits or characteristics and not take things too seriously is the best way to live.  We are all extraordinary in our own way and should be proud of that person we are. This is not to say that we can’t always improve on ourselves and evolve into a more diverse version.  As our bodies change over the years our mind should as well.  It is never too late to add another dimension to who we already are. ❤

Susan McCord @ http://www.youtube.com/twobeavers

Dear Sybersue ~ Is it Considered Cheating to Kiss a Girl Without Telling My Boyfriend?

Canadian Talk Show Host Susan McCord (Dear Sybersue) answers Kylie’s question from her advice column:

Dear Sybersue,
I am in a 2 year relationship with a great guy and do love him but I am very attracted sexually & emotionally to this girl at my gym!
She feels the same way and I am dying to kiss her and see what transpires! Guys seem to like girl or girl scenarios these days so I am not sure if it would be considered cheating….or would it??

What do you think?

Thanks Sybersue, Kylie

Dear Sybersue ~ Why do Guys Initially Act Interested but Never Call When They Say They Will?

Dear Sybersue Dating/Relationship/Lifestyle Advice Talk Show for Men & Women of all Ages!

Question from Candice:

Dear Sybersue:

Why do guys constantly waste my time when I am out for the night with the girls?  They spend all evening paying attention to me, never leaving my side, ask for my phone number and then never call!  My friends complain about the same thing too!

What gives? I’m tired of this!

Susan McCord @ http://www.youtube.com/twobeavers

 

Dating Advice- Dear Sybersue: After 6 months My Boyfriend Says He’s Not so Sure About Us Anymore! I Don’t Believe Him

Canadian Talk Show Host Susan McCord  & Advice Columnist (Dear Sybersue) Answers Sandi’s Question:

I have been with my boyfriend for almost 6 months and everything was going great until now!  All of sudden he seems distant and is saying things like he’s not sure if he wants a commitment, he is also thinking of traveling to Australia with a buddy for 4 months and other things like that!

He is also saying that he feels a little overwhelmed at how fast we have moved in our relationship. He says he loves me but his actions have changed a lot!  He is less affectionate towards me especially in the bedroom.  I don’t really believe that his feelings have changed towards me and think it is just a matter of time until he figures it out.

What do you think?

Thanks, Sandi

http://www.facebook.com/DatingRelationshipTalkShow 

Please send your questions to  susanmccord9@gmail.com