Today on Dear Sybersue I discuss the topic: Rebuilding a Past Relationship With Your Ex.
Sometimes we meet the love of our life before we are ready.
The timing of why things didn’t work out in a past relationship can be a problem for many reasons. It could have been due to finishing up college, getting your degree, you were starting a new career, or maybe you just weren’t ready for a long-term commitment due to your age or busy lifestyle.
When the foundation of a connection is powerful, love can often stand the test of time even though you are not together as a couple. You have an undeniable chemistry that never seems to dissipate. The most important thing to think about if you are in a position to rekindle a romance with your Ex is to understand what the problems were that made you both break up in the past.
If there were any controlling or abusive situations with your Ex, it is NEVER worth repeating an unhealthy or unsafe relationship!
Learning from past mistakes is the lesson you should always take away from any partnership, but don’t allow yourself to go back to someone hoping they have drastically changed. Revisiting negative patterns is not what you are supposed to bring with you from a bad relationship! Understanding what you deserve in a loving partnership, and always respecting yourself, will keep you in a healthy space of mind.
Moving forward from any past love connection, you should now comprehend the importance of being in a reciprocated scenario with a partner. You both need to be on the same page with what you want for your future together. You also need to be able to communicate well as a couple and be emotionally available for one another. There is no room for mind games or bad behavior in a solid relationship.
What should I look out for if I am thinking of getting back together with my Ex?
- Do you both have regular thoughts that your Ex was the one that got away?
- Meet up with them for a coffee first. No alcohol should be involved, as you want to have a clear head when you sit down with them.
- Don’t sleep with them right away. Sex can really mess you up and hold your emotions hostage. You know what I am talking about!
- Communicate to each other what you learned about yourself during your time apart. What new tools can you bring into your partnership moving forward should you decide to try again?
- Are you both willing to go for couples counseling to ensure that the initial/past issues have been resolved?
- Do you want the same things for the future in a relationship?
- Are you on the same page with similar priorities?
- Can you both be emotionally available to one another?
- If there are children involved, how will you both handle a blended family lifestyle?
- Can you both agree openly that your feelings for each other are sincere, and that the love has always been there?
- Can you truly forgive each other for any past issues you had as a couple?
People can definitely change as the years go by, but the core of someone’s character usually stays the same.
If you and your Ex ended things in a kind and respectful way, it is much easier to rekindle a relationship. If you were blindsided, or they blatantly cheated on you, I would strongly advise you to rethink starting something back up with them again.
It is also important to know how they lived their life after their relationship with you. Did they quickly jump back into another relationship? Did they contact you right away saying they made a big mistake? Have they always stayed connected to you in some way since you parted ways?
Their actions should play a big part in your decision to let them back into your life. Their words are never just enough. This is your heart we are talking about, and it can only be broken so many times before you lose trust in relationships altogether.
If you have both had a reciprocated love that never really went away, there may be something salvageable at this later stage of your life. It is always worth a second chance if you are both on the same page with how to move forward together. This is a new chapter for both of you, so take your time getting to know each other again, and don’t jump in excitedly before weighing everything out.
If you have confirmed and worked on the issues from your past relationship trouble and you both have a clear understanding of what you need in this new partnership, then you are on a good path to start fresh as a couple.
Be smart and be very aware that there are many things to consider before you give your Ex another shot. You broke up with each other for a reason, so don’t take that lightly without delving into the depth of those reasons. Please watch the video above to hear more about today’s conversation.
Thank you, Sybersue <3
Private Dating Relationship Coaching With Sybersue – Please contact me @ https://www.calltheone.com/susan-mccord and message me there to set up a video call or voice call appointment within 24 hours. Thank you!
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