Dear Sybersue,
I need you to answer a question for me. I am a reasonably attractive 30 year old male and have no trouble meeting women for the most part. What bothers me is the attitude of many of the women I seem to come in contact with. They come across really high maintenance and stuck up! I frequent many different venues but all the women seem to be the same. I do have an affection for beautiful ladies who are under 25, do you think that could be the problem and maybe I should try dating older women? Please be frank & tell me truthfully what you think.
Fed Up Phil
ANSWER:
Hi Phil~
I am glad you wrote in about this, as many other male viewers of my talk show feel the same way you do. I always ask them the same question: “Did you observe any of these women before you spoke to them?” You mentioned that you like beautiful women under 25. You are stereotyping these women to be high maintenance but you do continue to go for this type. You asked me to be frank so I will ask you this; have you ever considered yourself to be high maintenance also and that you will only date in a certain league?
There are many attractive women who are also really sweet. If you spend some time watching a girl you are attracted to, you could tell so much about her in less than 15 minutes. See how she reacts to the waitress or other people she comes in contact with. Check out her body language. Is she confident, cocky or rude? Does she smile easily? Does she pay attention to her friends or is she “all about” meeting a guy or having her drinks bought for her? So many men are so enthralled with women’s appearance initially that they overlook numerous red flags right in front of them. (High maintenance women & men are so transparent for the most part, but many people choose to ignore it in the beginning!)
In answer to your last question, older women can be great. They usually don’t play games, which makes them easier to meet and more fun to date. If you are really attracted to your own age group though, you don’t have to give up that priority. Just don’t make it all about sexual chemistry or if she looks good on your arm walking down the street. Ask yourself why you are going for these Hollywood Trophy Types. I hate to use a cliché Phil, but “beauty truly is only skin deep.” If she doesn’t have some of that on the inside too, it is only a matter of time until her attitude will make her looks fade on the outside as well. Give the nice girls a chance too, you might be surprised how attractive they really are!
Keep in touch~
Sybersue
I feel very sorry for you guys that date High Maintenance Women, and you certainly better have a Very Large Bank Account.