Ill mental health can consume a person entirely and it can be hard for someone who loves them to stand by watching, feeling completely helpless and not knowing how to help.
This has been known to cause a few relationship problems if one partner can’t open up fully to the other one, or a partner doesn’t make an effort to understand what ill mental health may feel like for the other person and why they are acting a certain way.
It can be extremely frustrating to always be arguing over something neither of you can control or to constantly feel useless when you can see your partner is going through emotional torment. Here are some tips on how you can help and understand the appropriate etiquette for when your partner is having a low or anxiety-filled day.
The most important thing no matter what the circumstances is to remain patient. Anxiety attacks, low days, and all the baggage that accompanies ill mental health is never going to show up at a convenient time.
Even if you are running late, need to get to sleep or are in the middle of a busy shopping center, your partner will need time to recover and maybe even need to remove themselves from the situation completely.
It is important not to get frustrated and remember the best thing for your partner is to be supportive and do exactly what they ask to help them to feel better. This may not be the same every time.
Ask About Their Therapy
If your partner is currently going through anxiety counselling or talking to a therapist to find the root cause of why they are feeling the way they are, talk to them about their sessions.
Of course there may be some sensitive information they want to keep between themselves and their counselor but any information you can obtain on what to do to help while they are having an attack, will help you to feel a more equipped when these events occur.
Be Present And Adaptable
Some days your partner may appreciate you being there and looking after them and other days they may just want to be left alone. Depression can make a person feel extremely guilty. Your partner may try pushing you away as they do not want to bring you down.
It’s a good idea to reassure them that you are there for them no matter what and to listen to what they say and how they feel. Don’t be offended if your partner just wants to be by them self. They may be feeling extremely fatigued or just can’t handle social interaction that particular day.
However even when they want to be alone, knowing that you are nearby can be very comforting for them. Especially if ill mental health puts your partner in a vulnerable position they may need you if they suddenly have an anxiety attack or have any harmful thoughts.
If either you or your partner need to talk to someone at anytime of the day you can call The Samaritans, who will be able to connect you with a professional to talk to.
No one is the same when it comes to ill mental health and everyone will deal with it in their own individual way. If your partner has opened up about their struggles and can be themselves in front of you – without the mask that so many wear to hide mental health problems – they trust you and care deeply for you.
All you can do is try your best to help them and pick up strategies through experience of how best to help them. Talk to them, be open and patient.
Eventually, things will start to fall into a natural rhythm and you’ll be keyed in enough to intuitively understand how your partner is feeling.
Susan McCord @ The Dear Sybersue Talk Show