Loved your Video on “Dating Older Men vrs Younger Men” but I need to address something that frustrates me. I’m a 35 year old male and I have not figured anything out yet when it comes to meeting the right woman! Women are just strange creatures indeed, regardless of their age!
Younger women are on a learning curve about life and I don’t want to spend my life teaching them everything. (They also have this sense of entitlement that drives me crazy!)
Older women seem to have more regrets about what they did or didn’t do when they were younger and seem a little edgy for the most part! I’ve never dated an older woman (but I have spoken to many of them) so forgive me if my comment might offend you. All I know is that when it comes to a woman’s needs I bend over backwards till I break. Some say I try too hard and some say I don’t try hard enough. This is why they seem strange to me!
What do they really want???? If you ask me I think they are confused & don’t know at all…talk about mixed signals!
Thanks, Tony from Chicago
I am not offended at all & I agree with your frustration for the most part. You are at the age where you are ready to make some major life decisions and it isn’t easy! Make a list & write down all the important things you really want in a woman & don’t stop till you meet her. Sometimes we don’t find what we really want because we are confused as to what that is. We spend a lot of time saying “we know what we don’t want” but seldom say out loud “what is important” to us.
You shouldn’t have to bend over backwards for anyone in a relationship as it should be a reciprocated partnership where you both do things for each other. There “is” such a thing as being too nice or too doting on someone which can be a turn off for some women. No one wants someone they can push around in the long run ~ they will end up losing respect for that person because they have too much control & not enough excitement or occasional mystery. Being predictable can become boring over the years together and it is healthy & fun to keep them guessing just a little. I don’t mean continually playing games but change things up a bit so that it is refreshing to see each other again.
In the first stages of meeting someone new, do not put out “all of you” right away. Get to know them slowly & watch how they treat you & others around them. If there a sense of entitlement & expectations on their part, remove yourself. These are the ones who are probably saying you don’t do enough for them. Women who are takers are generally pretty obvious right from the start.
Be pleasant & respectful of your time with the women you are dating but don’t try too hard. When it is right, it really isn’t a lot of work & has a natural feel to it. The most important point in all of this is to know what “you” want, put it out there & believe she will show up in your life.
There is someone for everyone we just need to trust (& not ignore) our instincts, to allow the right one to come in.
Check out my video on Mixed Signals
Thanks for writing Tony, wishing you much love & happiness always.